Princess of the universe // Hardzzellee

Chapter 40

Later that night, Ben and Joe had helped Gwil to bed.
"How do you want to cuddle, love?" Ben asked.
"There's not much of a choice. I am only allowed to sleep on my back." Gwil opened his arms. Ben and Joe immediately crawled into his embrace.
"I love you. I love you. I love you. So, so unbelievably much," Gwil said. When Ben looked up, tears were already making their way down Gwil's face. Ben knew what Gwil needed most. So, he laid down again. Gwil tightened his grip around Ben and Joe. 

"I absolutely hated not being close to you. And not even hearing your voices through a phone call made it worse. It was torture." Joe tightened his grip on Gwil's shirt.
"I never want to go through something like that ever again. I get why they said it might be better to shut off the outside world. And it might have helped, but I am never doing this again." Gwil took a shaky breath. 

"Ben, I missed the way you take care of the three of us. How you always know what to do or say. I missed your voice and those angelic eyes of yours. And your hair and voice when you just wake up. I missed having you to talk to. And Joe, I missed that big heart of yours. The way you always help others. I missed your humor. Your energetic perspective of everything around you. I even missed your signature frown look. I missed having both of you to talk to when I hit a low point or when I achieved something. I love you guys more than anything. I can't even put it in words. But I never want to be apart from you for so long ever again," Gwil said. Finally, he looked down. When he met eyes with both of them, he broke. Big tears rolled down his cheeks. 

Ben placed his hand on Gwil's chest. Neither of them said anything while they let Gwil get his tears out.
"I am not going to lie, guys. I am not doing too well," Gwil mumbled. Joe took one of Gwil's hands in his own to give it a light squeeze. 
"Talk to us, love."
"As you saw today, my physical abilities are very low. I've trained a lot in the past few weeks, but somehow walking is still a struggle. Whatever we tried, it doesn't come naturally yet. I have to really think about how I need to move my leg to set the next step. My strength in my arms is completely gone too. They didn't really let me work on that, because all my energy had to go to walking." Gwil took a deep breath. 
"Not being able to move around and do my thing hasn't been very good for my mental state. And because I keep having nightmares about that day, I don't really rest at night." Gwil avoided their eyes.
"Can we try something tomorrow? I think it might impact your progress in walking. In a good way, of course," Joe said. 
"I'm open to anything that might help. Just don't be disappointed when nothing changes." Joe hummed.

"And those nightmares, we can try those exercises Julie gave me? I can look them up tomorrow," Joe said. Gwil nodded.
"If you have a nightmare tonight, do you promise to wake one of us? We want to be able to help you," Ben said. Gwil swallowed hard before nodding. 
"I can see how tired you are. Let's get some rest, love," Ben said. Gwil opened his mouth to argue, but immediately closed it again when he realized his eyes were indeed very heavy. 
"Ready for your forehead kiss?" Gwil asked while raising his eyebrows at his husbands. Joe nodded eagerly while Ben laughed softly. Gwil moved so he could kiss both of their foreheads.
"I love you two," Gwil said. Ben moved up so he could give Gwil an actual kiss.
"I love you too. More than you'll ever know," Ben said before giving Gwil another kiss. Joe moved up to do the same.
"I love you too, gorgeous," Joe said. Gwil smiled at him. Joe gave Ben a quick kiss before they both got comfortable again. 
"I'll never get used to the feeling of you two in my arms," Gwil said.

The next morning, Ben made a big breakfast for all of them. Addison was sitting opposite Gwil and was filling him in on all things Gwil had missed while he was away. Gwil had a big smile on his face while he listened to everything she was saying. He asked a few questions to let her know he was listening to everything she said. 

When they were done eating, Ben got up.
"Do you need help washing up?" Ben asked while he looked at Gwil.
"I think I can manage. Can you just walk with me to the bathroom, just to make sure?" Gwil asked. Ben nodded.
"Absolutely," Ben said. He stood up, followed by Gwil.

When they walked out of the bedroom half an hour later, Joe was waiting for them in the hallway.
"Gwil? Addison really wants to play hide and seek with you. I have helped her hide. You don't have to bend down or walk the stairs to find her," Joe said. Gwil took a deep breath.
"It'll take a while for me to get around the house," Gwil said.
"That's okay. She knows that, but she really wants to play."

Gwil slowly made his way through the house.
"Oh make a sound," Gwil called out. They heard a barking noise before a fit of giggles. Gwil smiled and turned towards the noise. Without thinking, he walked towards the sound. Ben and Joe locked eyes before giving each other a silent high-five. Gwil found Addison, hidden behind a curtain in their office. Addison followed him happily while he walked back into the living room.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" He asked while he looked at his husbands. His eyes suddenly widened.
"I just walked around, didn't I?" Gwil asked. Joe nodded.
"I figured that during therapy, they put all your focus on walking that you subconsciously become very aware of the fact that you need to walk. It's a bit as if you are trying to take control of your blinking and then want to turn back to automatic blinking," Joe explained. Gwil nodded slowly.
"That makes a lot of sense actually. "

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Hey guys,

A lot of angst in this chapter! We already established that I am an evil author, right?

Also, the spelling check I am using really wants to tell me that 'husbands' is not a word. So, I am making sure to use husbands as often as I can to piss it off. Obviously, I could just add it to the list of words he shouldn't look for, but I am stubborn. 

Take good care of yourself and others. Stay safe, stay healthy.

Goodbye,

Xx Itsametaphorjoe