I always thought we'd last a bit longer. Just few more months. Then graduation would happen, we'd each go to a different university and part ways. Until then, I hoped we'd do okay.
How wrong was I...
Of course, we were doing amazing. Always happy, holding hands, smiling, laughing, chatting,...
And then we started falling apart.
I remember the first time I started doubting us.
We were returning from school and he was silent, staring out of the window. I couldn't really make out whether he was tired or annoyed or if it was something else. I just tried my best in raising his mood as we'd always do when seeing the other one wasn't doing good.
Just this time, he wouldn't react. He wouldn't even look at me.
I hugged my schoolbag, leaning my cheek on it as I was watching him, confused.
Did I do something? No, he would've told me.
Maybe it's school. There's been a lot of tests these two weeks and he has that seminar tomorrow. He said he'll get tested in it. Yes, that must be it.
So I remained silent until we got to my village. I got up, swinging my schoolbag over my shoulder. "I'm going," I smiled, leaning in to kiss him as always.
He was watching me and just as I was near his lips...
He turned his head away.
I stopped, confused even more.
I felt like everybody around was watching us while I was frozen in those few seconds, not understanding why'd he do that.
He looked back, let me peck his lips, his eyes looking away though. And then he'd go back to staring out of the window, not saying anything.
I got out of the bus, taken aback, not sure what just happened. My hands started trembling from the shock as the situation has kicked in my anxiety. And so I squeezed the straps on my shoulders stronger. I felt pain in my chest, uneasiness in my eyes, my lower lip became unstable,...
He must be stressed because of school.
That's what I told myself and somehow, it was enough to make me raise my chin and get my hopes up again. I took a few deep breaths and I was fine.
He for sure would've told me if he didn't want to be with me anymore or if there was a problem in our relationship... right?
I guess you're fine...
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Deep end |ENG|
FanfictionThe song continues as the realisation is hitting me harder and harder. There's a sting in my eyes, a dagger in my chest. "please, stop this pain" Tears are streaming down my cheeks as I recall all the moments when I told myself: "It's okay," and con...
