ten more reasons ~ ghost b.c

wonky

we got back to LA earlier this morning. i told everyone my goodbyes and that i would call them when i land later. i look at my phone to see it's already three in the afternoon, my flight leaves at five.

i put my phone down between per and i on the bed. he looks over at me with a sigh "let's pack" he gets up and grabs my suitcase from the living room "do you want me to drive with you or do you want to go alone?" he asks.

i stay quiet contemplating if i should still leave or not "raine?" my eyes meet his "i don't wanna go anymore..." i say throwing the covers over my body "funny" he says and starts looking at my clothes in the closet "no i'm being serious, i'm not going home i'm just going to go stay with sophie for a while" i tell him and he drops his hands to his side

"seriously?" he asks tilting his head down "yeah, i feel like once i leave i'll be even more... out of it" i admit. he sighs happily and plants a kiss on my forehead, then my lips "i'm glad" he puts my suitcase on the floor and gets back in bed.

"everyone will be happy to hear you stayed" "i'm sorry for being all over the place... not making up my mind and such, it's just been busy recently and i haven't had time to actually... think about things" i interrupt and he quickly dismisses it

"love, don't worry about it... we all get a little wonky sometimes" he motions to his head and i smile at him. he plants a kiss on the top of my hand. i grab my phone and decide to pull a prank on the group.

i text them saying they needed to stop by my apartment real quick, per needed help with his guitar and a song idea before i leave. it wasn't long before the door rang. per told me to stay in here and then walk out into the living room where they will all be. everyone says their hello's and make themselves conformable.

i walk out to the kitchen with my eyes on my phone and my head casted down "hey guys" i say like any other time and chris picks his head up "hey lorraine- wait-" "you didn't leave?!" cosmo asks and i laugh while i make myself some tea "why didn't you go?" jutty asks and i shrug my shoulders "i realized it would be better if i stayed" i wait for my water to heat up and jutty walks over, wrapping me in an embrace

"well i missed you" he says with a smile and i push him away jokingly "tea?" i ask and he happily accepts a glass. i pour the hot water over the tea bags and hand him the mug "sugar is in the cabinet-" "what the hell are we doing drinking tea? where's the beer?" cosmo asks and looks in the fridge "i second that" chris holds a hand up from the couch

"we're out at the moment" per tells them "but you could go grab some?" i ask and he stands up "yes i can" a closed smile grows on his lips. he puts his leather jacket on, ties his black lace up vans, and grabs his keys from the counter.

he places a quick kiss on my lips. chris whistles teasingly and cosmo starts making kissing noises "both of you" he points his finger at cosmo then chris in one swift motion "grow up" he then flips them off before closing the door behind him with a smile. "gotta love him" jutty says and i laugh.

i sit on the counter and sip my tea "why didn't you leave?" chris asks and i shrug my shoulders "had a change of heart" i simply state, watching the liquid swirl in my cup "yeah?-" "yeah" i quickly tell chris "i'm still going to go see sophie tomorrow, i texted her earlier" i tell them all

"since nobody has the balls to ask i'm just going to do it..." cosmo sighs "lorraine are you okay? like, genuinely?" he asks me. i take the mug down from my lips and look to jutty then to cosmo "do i not seem fine?-" "it's just... you're distant. like you're here but you're not" chris speaks up from the couch.

i go quiet and look up the ceiling with a sigh "is it the band?" jutty asks while leaning against the counter next to me "no! not at all- absolutely not" i completely shut that down "is it per?" chris asks and i shake my head "no i just- i think i'm going through a knot that will work itself out. there's nothing really wrong" i shrug my shoulders

"and that's okay... we've all been there. just don't push us away, okay?" cosmo asks and i nod my head "okay" i agree and jutty pulls me into a side hug "thank you guys for being worried.. i'm okay... i promise" i reassure them all. "you really don't have any beer?" chris sighs and i pull away from jutty

"i'm sorry. you know there's this thing called tour i've been on-" "oh shut it" jutty nudges me. we all continue to talk and wait for per to get back.