Hidden Hues Of Henna

Kasmein waadein (I)

Part-1

Raghav helped his mother sit on the bed properly before picking up the duvet stylishly laid at the end of the bed and placing it upon her legs. All the while,the woman said nothing. Her shock was still palpable from the lost look in her eyes and the pale complection that had come over her face. Raghav would have been a blatant liar if he said he did not feel similarly.

Just as he was about to turn away from his mother and head out of his room,she caught his wrist and tugged at it.

Immediately leaning down to her eyes-level,he questioned gently,"What is it Amma?"

"How do we apologise to her after all this?" The old woman looked positively panicked as she clung onto her son's arm and asked him the question in all honesty. More than anything it was guilt which was making her anxious.

"I should have never ever taken her there. But-but I never knew Raghav. I honestly —" Raghav would have rejoiced in the fact that his Amma was sharing her thoughts with him but in that moment he understood her concerns more than anything else. His own shock was prominent but he knew he had to calm down his mother lest she should again make herself sick with worry.

"Amma,just calm down alright?We are at home now. She's safe,we are safe."Raghav assured her with the only thing that was somehow making sense. He could not go back in time and prevent the horrible experience now, could he?

"She must be so devastated!" Jaya told,almost on the verge of tears.

"I-I'll take care of her Amma." Raghav assured firmly.

"You should go to her now. Go,go. Don't wait here!" His mother immediately let go of his arm and gestured him to go.

"Okay Amma." Raghav sighed before stepping away and turned to leave but not before gesturing the nurse stood at the door to take care of Jaya.

•••

What happens when every last bit of your expectations is disposed off by the cruelty of reality? Nothing but disappointment is left.

Then why did it still hurt?

Why wouldn't the hope,the pain stop?

Why wouldn't her heart just forget every little thing that happened and let her be in peace of her surrender?

Pallavi had given up on the Deshmukhs the minute she took the first step away from their house. To her, their home, their family were entirely their matters. Or were they not?

Why had she not just turned and rushed away the minute she registered where Jaya had brought her?

Why did she wait and be humiliated in the worst words?

Why did she not counter Vijay or Sulochana when her brain was buzzing with comebacks and snarky remarks?

Where did she go wrong this time?

Again,there was no answer.

The adamance to get her things out and away from the house was partly because she knew she needed it and partly because of her cleverly suppressed fury on the Deshmukhs. They had no rights on her now,they had disowned her wholly—she had accepted that. But their utter lack of decency and courtesy made her feel disgusted and angry.

The way Sulochana flung her belongings to the floor made the crack in her heart deepen. Remembering how she had even respected the smallest of small things in their house made her rethink about the circle of fate. She had given and given and given and yet had been left empty handed and humiliated. Accepted that she lied and that she hid important things but was that such a big blot that her entire character was marred mercilessly by it, making her 'family' throw her out.