weak | choni

22: "Resistance"

"I'm going to talk to her," Cheryl announced once her tears had subsided. The other three girls looked at her like she was insane, and Cheryl bit her lip nervously.

"I don't know if that's a very good idea," Josie said carefully. She didn't want to upset Cheryl even more, but all the girls had seen Toni's reaction and were aware of just how miserable their brown-eyed cheer mate had been for the past month. Following Cheryl's disappearance, Toni had been a completely different person.

Cheryl sighed, knowing they were probably right. All she wanted to do was go inside and settle whatever Toni had against her right away. But the more she thought about it, the more terrified she was to hear what Toni had to say to her.

"I shouldn't have come back as a surprise," Cheryl shook her head and sat down on the front porch. "I just ... I thought she'd be excited. Apparently not. God, how could I be so fucking selfish?" She let her head fall into her hands and took a deep breath.

"You could always t—," Cheryl stood up before Veronica could finish her sentence.

"I'm tired," Cheryl admitted. "I'm just gonna ... go inside and sleep or something."

Valarie raised an eyebrow at her.

"I won't even talk to her," Cheryl jumped to her own defense, holding her hands up as if she were surrendering. "But it's kind of my house too ... so, I don't know." She sighed and ran a hand through her hair. She hadn't been prepared for this.

"Be careful," Josie was the first of the other girls to speak up. "You can call any of us if you need anything, okay?" Veronica and Valarie both nodded to show their support.

"Thank you," Cheryl half-whispered, enveloping all of her cheer mates into a hug.

"We're always here for you, Cher," Valarie laughed, ruffling her friend's hair. Cheryl gasped in fake shock and elbowed the other girl playfully.

Taking a deep breath, Cheryl turned around and faced the front door of the house. "I guess this is it," she muttered under her breath.

"Don't freak yourself out," Josie stepped up behind her friend and placed a hand on her shoulder. "It's Toni ... she won't stay mad at you for long. I think she's just confused."

Cheryl nodded and took a step forward, turning the doorknob slowly. "I'll text you later," she waved to her cheer mates, thanking them once more before slipping into the foyer of the house and closing the door behind her.

She saw Toni's shoes at the bottom of the staircase, knowing that she was most likely upstairs in the bedroom. Deciding to give her some space, Cheryl wandered into the kitchen and looked around. It was the same as she remembered it, but the only difference was that it wasn't as intimidating as it had been before.

While in rehab, Cheryl had slowly made progress. Well, she'd been forced to. It was the strictest combination of doctors and nutritionists she had ever had, and she couldn't get away with anything she'd been able to do previously.

She'd gained a good percentage of her weight back. At the beginning she had felt disgusted with herself, but not she could tolerate it. The thing Cheryl didn't understand, was that forcing her to eat didn't really help anything.

Sure, it helped her gain her weight back so she wouldn't crumple up and die as a human skeleton. But it hadn't fixed the problems that made her start skipping meals in the first place. At least now she could allow herself to eat something when she was hungry.

Something caught her eye, and upon further inspection she realized her guitar was still sitting in the same place it had been since she had left. A lump formed in the back of her throat and she suddenly realized how angry Toni could possibly be with her.