16 | i. a rollercoaster love

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when i made an effort to stop my heart from whispering your name ("noémie"), stop my mind from thinking about nothing except you, stop my feet from following you around until the end; i built walls as tall as the walls that surrounded me and close...

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when i made an effort to stop my heart from whispering your name ("noémie"), stop my mind from thinking about nothing except you, stop my feet from following you around until the end; i built walls as tall as the walls that surrounded me and closer me in, suffocated me like when someone once told me

to make sure i don't fall in love;

people like me hold you close to pick you apart and chew you open, day by day after the trust has been slowly, slowly developed over time (even with trust issues, it didn't take long with you). a wave of emotions washing your feelings away-they told me

it won't last;

they're touch engraved on my skin, my name muscle memory for their mouth, nights that feel like daydreams; fluttering kisses on every inch of our body-it won't last.

you're just hungry for love, they said. the desire to feel something, anything-i'll be sucked dry for one lone drop,

one taste of love and i'll clung onto it like it'll vanish from sight,

and sometimes it does,

so i'll take that advice and hang onto you tight; it's a rollercoaster, baby (mais je t'aime) but i love you.

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