Nameless Ghoul

Hellfire

It was the day before Yule and the Abbey was filled with busy Siblings and ghouls making last-minute preparations and socialising with lots of food and drinking. Tonight Papa was giving a special midnight mass which was open to the public, as was traditional, in the main part of the Abbey. Itzal was curious what the mass would be like. He hadn’t attended one since he’d been here, and he was fairly certain it would be different from the ones that Santos used to give.

They’d woken up late and stayed in bed chatting about the previous night’s social gatherings. Sunshine told him about the antics of Papa and the rest of them and it sounded like they'd had a fabulous time. She said that next year Itzal should come too.

He told her what had happened with Secondo’s ghouls and she was glad that it had gone well, as she knew how nervous he’d been beforehand. She said she didn’t really know them too well as they usually kept to themselves and gave off scary vibes, which made him laugh.

“You’re one of them now, so you need to keep up your air of mystery and be unapproachable,” she said with a cheeky smile. He frowned and she laughed. “Yes! Exactly like that! You fit right in with them already!” she said as she kissed his forehead.

“They’re actually really nice. But I know they have an image to keep up. I’m not exactly friendly and approachable, so maybe I will fit in. I still can’t believe I’m a Clergy ghoul now though.”

And he couldn’t. His brain was still catching up with everything that had happened. He was going with the flow, but he’d lived for so long in survival mode that if he thought about it too hard, it all just seemed too surreal to take in.

“It’ll be fine. Just don’t think about it too much and let it happen. How are you doing after last night?” she asked.

He felt his cheeks go red as he looked at her and smiled.

“It was perfect.” He simultaneously saw her smile and felt it through their bond. “It’s going to take me a while to get used to this, though. It’s a different bond than I’ve had before.”

She nodded in agreement.

The bond he’d had with Santos couldn’t compare to this one at all. Secondo had explained that a forced bond was much more painful than the bonds with the Clergy would be because of consent. When a ghoul consented to the bond, it was closer to a natural one, like the ones that ghouls shared with each other and it didn’t take much maintaining with magic. But an unnatural, forced bond like the one Itzal had with Santos was painful for the ghoul because of the magic needed to keep it in place. The collar Itzal had worn was like an extra chain linking him to Santos. The ghoul’s body and soul would try to reject the bond, so it was a constant battle between the two. That’s why it had constantly felt like an ache in his chest or like a feeling of dread.

A natural pairing bond between ghouls and ghoulettes was something much less complicated, but also more intense. It didn’t need any kind of ritual or magic to put it into place. Nature decided who was a good match and if they both felt the same way about each other, a bond would form. Only bonded pairs could produce offspring, and they both had to agree to it before it could happen. Families had their own more diluted form of bond.

A pairing bond was a direct link from one soul to another, and some pairs could even speak to each other telepathically. Itzal could feel Sunshine’s emotions now as an echo of his own, and it made the things he was feeling seem more intense as he was getting her responses too. The same would be true for her as well.

Itzal just hoped that his fucked up brain didn’t mess this up too much. He remembered what his mother had said about his sire keeping himself locked down in their bond, hiding himself from her. He didn’t want it to be like that with Sunshine, but he also didn’t want to scare her off by exposing her to his neurotic soul twenty-four seven.