Enhanced || JJK

XXXV. Vulnerable

"So, you have many friends like him? He seemed to be older and I don't think I've ever seen him at uni." I asked trying to make it sound as innocent as possible.
"Yeah, well, he's... yeah, he's a couple years older and no, he doesn't go to uni, he works at his dad's company..."
"So how did you guys meet?" I kept asking.
"We... we met through other friends... just randomly... nothing much..." He seemed to be trying to get that conversation over with.
I wasn't suspicious, but his attitude just made it worse. However, I didn't really know what else to ask without making it sound like a police interrogation, so I just went silent

"Oh you must be joking! Kook!" I heard someone say after a few seconds and we both turned around to face the person.
I knew I recognised his voice, it was Jimin.
"Man, you didn't even let me say bye, you left in such a rush. Now I know why." He said then, looking at me. "Hi, Luna, a pleasure meeting you again!" He added, giving me a hug.
Jungkook seemed to be on edge.
"Hey, can I offer you guys a coffee? I got so wasted last night and then dragged myself outside of bed this morning for the meeting. I mean, you saw me there, I was barely awake." He commented, again mentioning these meetings that Jungkook had never explained to me. I mean, you don't call a meet up with friends a 'meeting', so it was either this Jimin guy had a very weird vocabulary or there was something Jungkook didn't want to share with me.
"Next time, okay?" Jungkook answered, being very dismissive towards his friend.
He said bye to him and dragged me away, while I could still see Jimin's confused expression mirroring mine. "Fine, I'll see you next Sunday", I heard Jimin shout from afar, the tone made him sound offended and reasonably so.

"Hey hey, wait, Jungkook, wait!" I kept telling him, until he stopped walking and let go of my hand.
"Why were you so cold to him?" I asked, really needing an explanation now, because I felt like he made me take part to his rude behaviour. After all, Jimin was being very nice and wanted to offer us a coffee.
"Why do you care?"
His answer shocked me, seeing him act like that was very weird. He was not like that and I had known him for my entire life, so I would know.
"This is not you, what's wrong?" I asked, trying to be understanding. I was sure there was something wrong.
After a couple of 'nothing's wrong' and 'I don't know what you're talking about', he surrendered.

"It's just... He always speaks out of turn... I like him, he's my friend and everything, but he just doesn't know when to shut up."
"Why? 'Cause you didn't want him to tell me about the meetings? I mean you don't have to if you don't want to, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't want to hear about it. Not to be nosy, just because I care about you and I like to hear about the things you do. But if you don't feel like you can tell me-" I started to say but he interrupted me.
"No, it's just... I want to tell you, but I don't know how you'll react and I don't want to feel stupid..."
"Why would you feel stupid? I wouldn't judge you, whatever it is..." I tried to reassure him.
After a long pause, in which I could tell he was struggling to decide, he finally spoke again.
"Promise you won't laugh." He asked.
"I won't."
"I... I go to a support group." He finally admitted, without being able to look into my eyes.
I was confused, that was not the direction I thought it was going to take and I wasn't sure of what to do with that information, nor how to ask more about it without sounding condescending.
"What... what kind of support group?"
"One for GM people who struggle..." I could tell he was feeling very vulnerable in that moment, so I took his hand and lead him to a more private part of the street.
"And what... why..." I struggled to get a full sentence out, since I had so many questions in my head, but he took that as a mockery.
"You promised you wouldn't make fun of me," he complained, while nervously ruffling his hair.
"No, no, I'm not, I'm... just... confused... I didn't even know such things existed..." I tried to explain.
If I had known, I would've advised Tae to join one. Then I started wondering if Tae knew about them and if he was also hiding it from me.
"What... what do you do there exactly?" I asked, genuinely curious. I honestly couldn't imagine what it could do to one's brain knowing that you're biologically destined to succeed , just like they wouldn't know what being biologically destined to fail feels like. And having a best friend that struggled with that had taught me not to be prejudiced about the matter. But Jungkook was still defensive and thought I wasn't being serious.
"Never mind, I shouldn't have told you. I knew you'd think it was stupid. 'What could a GM kid, designed to be perfect, possibly complain about?' I'm sure that's what you're thinking."
"Jungkook, hey, look at me... Babe, look at me!" I insisted, finally taking his face with my hands and forcing him to look at me, which he had barely done since we started that conversation. He was making up a whole different dialogue based on his fears and I wasn't going to let him do that.
His eyes were now fixated on mine and I could see the pain in his eyes.
"I don't think it's stupid! I'm asking because I genuinely care and because I wish I had known about this sooner. Now I'm the one feeling stupid for thinking badly of you all these years. I had no idea you struggled so much with being a GM and I wish I could be of any help or that you at least felt comfortable enough to tell me these type of things." I said everything that was on my mind, never breaking eye contact.
His muscles seemed to relax and then he hugged me, burying his face into the space between my neck and my shoulder.

"I'm sorry, Moon... I just thought... I thought you would think differently of me, if you knew... and I didn't want you to... I didn't want you to know that I need help..." He admitted while still hugging me, his voice trembling a little bit.
"Hey, we all need help, are you kidding? And the smartest of us are the ones who actually ask for it... So yeah, I definitely think differently of you now that I know, I think that you're someone I can learn a lot from..." I reassured him, while admitting the admiration I felt for him in that moment. I thought I knew everything about him, but I started to feel like I should probably be less arrogant and think that what I knew about him was simply the surface. I wanted to know the real him, through and through, and I was going to. Because the glimpses I was getting of the real him were making me think that if I liked the surface, I was definitely going to love the inside. And the plan with which the whole situation had started was actually a failure from the beginning, because knowing him better would've only made me like him more.

Oh, the plan! I had forgotten about that!