On March 5th I rested just south of Texas, somewhere beyond the country line I basked in the heat of Yucatan, the unforgiving sunshine And reminisced on what it felt like to lose you. The emotions, I could not retrieve, but last March 5th my father watched me He sat on the couch by my side And it was the first time I had seen him cry in years.
On March 5th You are not here In fact, we haven't spoken in months, it's nearly been a year. They say that The World, ruled by Saturn, means that I am integrating into something new, But every now and then I think of you. I only wonder if you're still uncontrollable, I don't think of anything more, I just remember you in mere snapshots, You, asleep on the bathroom floor. I always felt so sorry for you Now I don't think I do.
I'd like to think that the cards are right, That I am excavating this life with the right person by my side, That I am more than my imagination which always got me in trouble, And perhaps that is where I went wrong with you. Pointe Inn was never real, and I'd spent a great deal of those two years Harboring the resentment that I'd always feel Toward your obstinance and senseless spiels.
My poetry, I'd always keep tucked beneath the bedsheets. But with him, he listens to my thoughts, and he does it for free. There's no exchange of jests and pity. No need to shed my clothes after wearing my heart on my sleeve. There has only ever been his silent love language, It is in the way that he looks at me.
I think I'll hate you until I'm dead, but I am so in love with the thoughts in his head And sometimes I hate that mine are not always as pretty. But he is light, my north star, And I don't mind when he goes to the bars, I can breathe in every instance when he is not with me. That all counts for something, The proof is in this person I am becoming.
And at the Riviera Maya, I saw my reflection in the pool as he stood behind me. Who is this girl? Calm and happy. You have never known her. You do not even know him And that he has been the beginning of everything.
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