Entries of Edith-Solaire (Discontinued)

Chapter 3

[2018]

"Edith, you have to! You're fourteen already and if you wait any longer then you might not integrate well with your pack," Dad said in an exasperated voice, " I can't teach you, Cam and Rigel can't either! You know that, don't you?"

I'm curled up in a ball, slowly shaking my head. He's all I need, I don't want to be left behind. I could feel my breath become shallow and quick, my body began to tremble. I can feel Will's core trying to soothe my own, my own core seems to try and take me for its own.

"I don't need a pack, I don't want to be in one! I'm a Solaire member. This is where I belong, Will." I whispered. Uncurling myself, I stood up trying to make haste to my room but to be blocked by Will. Why do I keep forgetting about vampire speed?

"Edith Solaire, you are to join a pack for three years and if you refuse to integrate with them by the end of those years, I do appreciate that you consider the Clan as family you need to be in a pack. But after those years I won't bother you about this topic any more," his voice finally cold towards me, "Do you understand?" I pulled my gaze away from him and onto the floor. I could feel my cheeks heat up. I nodded, swallowing my nerve to refuse this. To bite back.

"Good, I'm going to set up a cover for you. It's dangerous to claim you're a Solaire being a shifter. I'll hire an unempowered human to be your faux father," Will started to explain, " and the pack you're joining is the Shaw pack, Edith." I was still staring at the floor, I nodded.

Don't need a pack, why won't he get it through his head? He sent me off to do whatever I please. And I hurried outside, I started running as soon as I saw the forest coming near. Following the path to my safe space. Somewhere I have control over.
Soon I was at the doorstep, I opened the door and rushed inside. I could feel tears swelling up. Fuck! He doesn't hate me, he can't hate me! He won't do anything bad Edith! Then why? Why does he want me to be sent away to a pack? Does he still want me?

Lighting the candle with magic, taking off all my upper clothing and I plucked some candles off from the floor and heated the bottom of them. I placed them on my shoulder and started to melt them onto me. I need to make my head empty-too loud, too many bad thoughts. The wax dripped onto my bare back, with each passing moment I could feel myself relaxing. An hour and a half later, I was leaning on a wall.

"Edith!" Will's voice shook me back into reality, "What are you doi-" I put out the candles immediately and started to pluck off the wax. He just stood there in astonishment.

"I needed to relax, William. And before you fuss Cam knows and approves. It isn't harming my skin, and it's helping me mentally. I use a certain brand that also helps with any skin problem." I spoke. He just nodded and went out, I continued to peel the wax off of me.

Maybe I should tell him how I felt? Cam and I have been working together on that but it still is an issue for me. I just don't want to bother him with stupid things like this when I can handle it just fine.