Prodigal Son

chapter 15

Frankie leaned against the window, her face pressed against the glass.
Doctor McSwain rushed around, shouting orders at several other people in scrubs.
They peeled off Cody's jacket, gently flipping him over.
Frankie couldn't see the back of his neck, where he'd ripped out the implant, but she could see the wince from the doctor, the grim expression.
"You should get some rest. You've been through a lot."
Dani slowly walked up beside her, her eyes trained on the floor.
Frankie sighed, turning her head.
"You're one to talk."
Dani snorted at the blunt remark, then grew somber.
"... There's.... Not really much we can do now. It's all in the doctor's hands."
"... That was a really bad thing, wasn't it? When he ripped the implant out?"
Dani finally looked into the room, her hands clenching.
".... I didn't understand all of what Graham said. But I got the gist of it. The chip was already damaged, probably from the explosion. The control was glitchy because of that, and let Cody fight just enough to fully break free. Ripping out the implant broke the control, but.... It was connected to his nervous system. His body suffered a full system shock when that link was cut. And ... We don't know what state his mind is in. The control is broken, but the damage is.... Bad. We have no idea if he'll wake up hating us, the old Cody, or something else entirely."
Frankie stared in, getting glimpses of his bruised, burned legs.
".... Why don't you hate me?"
Dani started, whipping her head around.
"What?!"
".... I... I could've killed him. That stunt blowing up the hoverboard, he was still attached to it!"
She turned away, taking a few steps down the hall. 
".... I almost killed my best friend. First i couldn't reach him in time, then I nearly blew him up!!"
Dani grabbed her shoulder, leading her to a bench against the wall.
They sat down, and Dani sighed.
"Frankie, I know it doesn't seem like it, but it was the best call. Yes, it was risky, and could've ended badly. But you didn't have a choice. If you didn't take out the hoverboard, he only would've gotten worse."
Frankie's hand went to the necklace pendant.
"I... I just...."
".... I know... I know..."
Frankie pulled the pendant out, rubbing a thumb over it as she chuckled under her breath.
"Heh.... You know... I always wanted what you guys had. It was just me and my dad for the longest time. I... I don't remember my mom. Now I have a mom, and a baby sister. But Cody's always felt like my brother, in a way. We've always been there for each other."
Dani sighed, then grabbed Frankie's hands, looking at her gently.
".... Cody's always been there for us. Now.... It's on us to be there for him. And we will be. Every step of recovery, no matter how long it takes."
Frankie agreed, but couldn't bring herself to say anything hopeful.
Everything just felt so...
Wrong.
"If we won..."
-
"Then tell me why it feels like we lost."
Kade pressed his hand against the glass, his gaze unwavering.
Heatwaves's body was suspended in the air, a haunting image.
He'd been cleaned up, the dried energon and grime from the fight wiped away.
The glass of his window had been completely removed, but shadows covered up Kade's view of the interior.
"Shouldn't you be at the hospital?"
Rafael approached behind him, but he didn't turn, instead addressing his reflection in the glass.
".... I don't like hospitals."
An understatement, really.
He'd tried. He'd tried, but ..
His skin crawled before he even set foot in the door.
God, the guilt was destroying him.
But he just couldn't do it.
He saw something in the reflection, and finally turned, seeing Rafael extending a coffee mug.
He hesitated, but took it, nodding greatfully.
Rafael took a sip from his own, then motioned to Heatwave.
"What's the difference between here and there? This is basically the Cybertronian hospital."
"It's.... Different."
"Is it because he's not human?"
Kade sighed, then slowly crouched to the ground.
".... I don't know.... I just... I can't be there.... God...  I'm a coward...."
Rafael was quiet, then got down on the floor, still keeping a distance.
"What happened the last time you were in a hospital?"
Kade was surprised by the question, but looked down, gripping the mug tightly.
".... Dad. Dad was in an accident. A building collapsed, a ton of debris landed right on him. We spent hours waiting for news. Everybody, Bots included, blamed themselves in some way."
Memories came flooding back now.
The stress of the waiting room, pacing around the hall, all four Burns siblings worried out of their minds, in various stages of denial, grief, blame, and stress.
The second he'd tried setting foot in the hospital, those feelings came flooding back, but so much worse.
".... I can't go in there until I know he's okay. I can't."
Rafael just nodded thoughtfully.
".... Can I tell you a story, from my days on Team Prime?"
"... Sure..."
Rafael shifted his position, taking a deep breath as he cleared his thoughts.
"There were a lot of really dark times. Hope was easy to lose, and the hits just kept coming. But one of our darkest, was when Unicron got involved. For them, it was a doomsday prophecy. A race against the clock to stop the end of the world. But then.... I got hurt."
Kade's attention shifted, and Rafael knew he was invested.
"Bumblebee and I were on our way to base. Then... Megatron hit us with a blast of Dark energon. Bee was able to shake it off, but.... I almost died. It started destroying my body from the inside. If it weren't for some quick thinking from Ratchet, I wouldn't be here."
"That... Sounds pretty intense. I'm... Sorry you had to go through that."
Rafael nodded, thinking back.
"I was just 14 at the time."
Kade froze, his cup halting just before it met his lips.
14....
Cody's age....
Rafael noticed his reaction, and continued.
"I recovered, but it wasn't over. I honestly think it scared everyone else more than it scared me. Jack's mom in particular, she forced me to leave the base, while Jack and Miko protested and stayed. I felt... Helpless. Totally helpless. I didn't have a choice in anything, everybody was treating me like I was made of glass."
Kade stood up, his hand again going to Heatwaves's stasis tube.
"... I.... I get it. I shouldn't treat him like he's fragile, but.....god.... Everything just feels so.... Hopeless. Heatwaves's in a coma, Cody might have permanent brain damage, I just...."
He sunk back to the floor, his expression grim.
".... We won .... But we lost."
-
Charlie sighed deeply as he watched the coffee pot fill, absently taking out the sugar.
"... Charlie..."
He turned, seeing Woodrow and Doc slowly entering the kitchen.
Woodrow looked surprised by the damage to the upstairs floor, though Doc had already seen it, and merely walked around.
"What are you two doing here?"
Doc leaned against the counter, watching him pour a cup.
"Making sure you get some rest. Charlie, we're worried."
Charlie sighed, and spooned some sugar into the cup.
"I know, so am I. Blades said Heatwave is in a stasis coma, and the hospital says Cody's body is basically trying to reboot itself."
He felt a hand on his shoulder, Doc's firm, but gentle grip.
"We were talking about you, old friend."
Charlie looked up at that, and groaned.
".... Oh... What is this, an intervention?"
Woodrow raised his hands awkwardly.
"Surprise...."
Doc elbowed Woodrow, who walked over to Charlie's other side.
"Look, bro.... We just.... noticed you really haven't taken time to process things. We know this can't be easy to think about, and just...."
He trailed off, and Doc finished.
"We wanted to make sure you know you're allowed to grieve. This is hard time for your family, Charlie. Please, don't bottle it up."
"Ezra, I'm not bottling anything. I've just been.... Busy, Dealing with everything."
Now was Woodrow's time to sigh.
"Look, Charlie. I may not have been very involved with my family's lives, but I know when my brother is in denial."
"What are you -"
Before he could protest, both Woodrow and Doc grabbed his shoulders, leading him down the hall to his bedroom as Woodrow quipped,
"Like we said, intervention!"
"But.... I don't need an intervention!"
Doc gave him a tired look.
"Woodrow was quite insistent on talking it out. Personally, I was rooting for lacing your coffee with a sedative, but this works too, I suppose."
"..... WAIT-"
Woodrow banged open the door, and they shoved Charlie towards the bed. Exasperated, but opting to humor them, Charlie sighed, and matched over, sitting down on the edge.
"Okay, let's get this "intervention" over with."
Woodrow flopped down on the bed, placing a hand on his shoulder.
"GO TO BED!!!'
Charlie stared blankly, and Doc interjected,
"You're overworking yourself. I know you're worried, but there's nothing you can do for the time being. Please, get some rest."
"You don't understand... I... I can't just... I need to be ready."
"Ready for what?"
".... Anything."
Charlie really wished he had his coffee, as his hands figeted with the blanket spread.
".... I need to be ready. Just... Just in case. I let my guard down, my son got kidnapped and brainwashed! I... I know it's over but... But..."
Doc leaned in, and started rubbing his back.
"It doesn't feel like it's ever truly over."
Charlie leaned down, his face in his hands.
"... It doesn't seem like it ever is.... Like it ever will be... Like it ever could be..."
Woodrow touched his other shoulder.
"... It's not on you to bear alone, Charlie. You have us, you have us all."
"..... I was supposed to protect my son. But... Now the doctors are saying he'll likely never be the same.... Heatwave almost died... It's not over... It can't be..."
"And it's not."
Doc and Woodrow accidentally chorused together, exchanging a look of surprise before continuing.
Doc explained,
"Both Cody and Heatwave's recoveries will be... Rigorous. Likely extensive physical therapy, as well as.... Mental evaluation."
"I know, I know."
Woodrow rubbed his neck, saying,
"But... We're all going to help them. You're not the only one worried sick, Charlie."
Doc nodded.
"We're... We're all a family. We're all here for each other. We're here for them, and we're here to make sure you don't collapse of exhaustion."
Charlie smiled.
"That's... Fair. I... Thank you."
Woodrow lightly shoved him, but smiled.
"Now get some sleep, or I'll let Doc use that sedative."
Doc patted his overcoat pocket menacingly, but Charlie only rolled his eyes.
"Okay, okay, I surrender. I'll get some sleep."
Woodrow jumped up, pumping the air.
"HAH! THE INTERVENTION WINS!"
Doc stood up, and started herding Woodrow out.
"Let's leave him to it, shall we?"
"Oh, right, right!"
The two shuffled out, and after the door closed, Charlie leaned back, stretching out on the bed.
He gazed up at the ceiling, his mind wandering.
His own words started echoing to him, thinking of the moments before disaster.
He thought about reassuring his son that someday, he'd find his place, trying to quell that rush to join the team.
.....
A large breath of air escaped his pained lungs.
..... That rush to partner with a bot.
..... He was trying so hard to get his son to take it slow.
Trying so hard to teach him that restraint wasn't a punishment, it was trying to get him to savor his childhood.
His eyes burned.
He'd almost lost his son.
God... So much changed in a few hours...
Tears started welling up.
Ezra was right. He did bottle up.
He bottled it all up, trying to help his kids deal with their emotions, trying to be the shoulder to cry on.
After all, Chief Charlie Burns was the foundation, his kids the bricks.
And if a foundation wasn't steady, the whole house collapsed.
But he could feel himself crumbling, as his body started to heave and shake.
He curled up on the bed, and it all spilled out.
He was Chief Charlie Burns.
And he'd failed his youngest son.