Where's My Love? - Lo'ak

Chapter 56: The Pain That Follows

Mentions of Nudity and Suicidal Thoughts in This Chapter. Along with Grief. The Nudity in this chapter is meant to be intimate, please don't sexualize it!

Also, fair warning, I have no idea the rituals that go into the prep work before the return of Eywa, so this is all from my imagination on what I think would happen.

What does one do when you lose the love of your life? Do you get angry? Do you accept it? Do you hold onto hope that it's a bad dream?

Lo'ak doesn't know. All he knows is that Esmyrie's eyes are staring at him blankly, lifeless, and it's too much.

"Ma Esmyrie? Baby.... It's time to wake up... I know I said it would be okay... That I understand but you need to get up... Please get up. Please baby." Lo'ak cries, cradling his dead mate in his arms, tears falling rapidly, his breath quickening.

The first stage of grief: Denial.

Lo'ak stands up suddenly, his hand moving to the flower on his ear, but it isn't there.

His flower isn't there.

Just like his lover isn't here.

Lo'ak breaks.

He begins walking towards the ocean, but Jake grabs his arm gently.

"My flower.... My flower is gone. I just need to find my flower. Okay? I just need my flower.... She is just upset and ignoring me because the flower is gone! She'll wake up when I get a new flower!" Lo'ak says panicked.

He is delirious, that much Jake can tell, and he wishes he could take his son's pain.

"Son..."

"Let me get a new flower dad! Dad, let me get a new flower! She is just asleep right now! She is giving me the silent treatment because of a flower!!"

His eyes briefly meet his dead mates corpse.

A corpse, she is nothing more than a corpse.

The second stage of grief: Anger

Lo'ak clenches his fist and pushes his father, grabbing for his knife, his eyes set on the boat that has submerged.

"I'm going to kill them! I'm going to kill him!" Lo'ak doesn't know who did this to Esmyrie, but he has a good guess.

Who hates Na'vi, and would take the one thing away all Na'vi care for so deeply? QUARITCH.

"Son... Stop, please." Jake says, crouching down to be level with his son.

"He did this to her! That fucking demon did this to her! I'm not just going to let that go! I'm not just going to accept that! I'm going to kill him. Slowly. Make him suffer like he made her suffer." Lo'ak grits out.

Tuk cries out at her brothers words, and Neteyams eyes move from Esmyrie's still body to Lo'ak, his expression being utterly broken.

Jake takes a deep inhale and exhale, moving a braid out of his son's face, gently grabbing onto his son's hand that holds the knife.

"My baby boy... They are all dead. I killed him. I watched as his body drowned." Jake tries to reassure.

At his words Spider appears, breath heavy, his gaze quickly meeting the still body. Spider stays silent, his mouth opening in shock. Esmyrie, his friend, is dead.

"I don't fucking care if you killed him! I'll resurrect him just to kill him myself!" Lo'ak looks like a mad man, and Jake gently takes the knife from his son's hold before he can hurt himself.