Loving me forever | book 2 of autosexual confessional ✔️

Christmases ( memory)

Do you want to learn that most of my good memories have come during around Christmas or Halloween so here we go the first one was that the kindergarten teacher Mrs. Wilson was a real shithead one Christmas and had me strung up by my fingernails more or less figure of speech because I did something stupid. or supposedly I did something stupid. So I got home my parents gave me a talking to and then told me to take a walk with them down to the end of the street and into the paddock which was a field at the end of our street there there was a turquoise blue pink purple sky of winter it was almost dusk everything was pastel colours and beautiful like a paintings and my parents said lateral ramp this was after my fathers stroke and he said F and showed my mom and I said fuck shit damn whatever word can come out of my mouth that day at the top of my lungs as we were walking through the snow in the field at the end of our street. I miss that feel very much snow because of its good memories I'll tell you more memories about it later but anyway after that instead of being penalized for supposedly doing something stupid that the shit head teacher said I did....... Forgetting it all out I was allowed to go to the dollar store and get a Covid nine teen like ball that sticks to the wall why do you throw it and that was the end of it and go to the pub and have a grilled cheese that was the first fucking good memory I ever had in school. My parents fought for me to stay in school even though it was Catholic school and Catholic school was it shit box to me. I have made some friends at the time it was kindergarten Sierra McKenzie and Karen were the only ones that were my friends I didn't even think of the other party mouth little brat because he was just a little shithead. I always remember this kid Mitchell black yeah oh I still dread his name. And Mitchell black always tease me about my interests in science disabilities with PTSD and Asperger's as well as my heritage was being trash talked as well through his behavior. It was when I was in kindergarten I learned how to give the finger as well. Now in my day we didn't have a shit like that choking game or suicide or bullycide we just had either an idiot kid who acted up or a really stupid teacher. I've never even heard of an eating disorder until I was 13 years old. And I have already think mention that once that being said I've never heard of the choking game we never believed in that back then because we thought getting high was my playing real games like soccer or whatever tag hide and seek ghost in the graveyard Ron Ron Ron or something along those lines is actually fun and actually safe. I learned about the choking game when I was in my teenage years by watching Dr. G and also my watching the news and I was shocked if these kids were stupid enough to do this kind of shit I also learned about bullycide which is suicide through bullying and suicide during my teen years as well which was not very fun and as I said I was dumbfounded at this I knew about horrible horrible things like the holocaust World War II world war one Korean War you name it but I've never heard of bullycide suicide and the choking game that I never even heard of I have heard of child soldiers I have heard of everything else imaginable but the idea of little kids choking themselves to get a high was something I did not grasp as an adult still don't grasp why the fuck would you want to do that to yourself or your friend and kill yourself over something that could be easily done by running around a high. And I did not believe in bullycide I didn't believe that there was such a thing until I was watching Dr. G and was watching the news and stuff also I did not believe in suicide I did not I couldn't fathom the fact that you can turn your hand against yourself and the fact that you can do that boggled my mind more so than anything else. I was more than disturbed one day when I was watching the teen files which is something like the FBI files by four teenagers and they would talk about the choking game Bullycide suicide bullying And stuff I decided I was going to not fit and fuck the hell with everything and son of a bitch to the world.
This too was kind of a bittersweet memory as well because it got me interested in forensic pathology but then I was one in grade 11 or 12 and that's when I started hating doctors and decided to give up on that I wanted to help the kids who suffered from bullycide suicide bullying and the choking game and tell their story and make other people aware that these things are not acceptable or allowable in society that fitting in is nothing more than a pile of shit that's why I wanted to be a forensic pathologist. It tells society that it's idea of getting high it's idea of being beautiful as idea being normal is abnormal and that it's deadly. So that being said that was a bittersweet memory I had that wasn't before Christmas I was during April fools day. Most of my good memories were during Christmas I can write them off a couple of good ones. One was that instead of getting shit for not doing my math homework my father shared let's go and look at the Christmas lights around the neighbourhood and we did then we walked down the street after our Christmas light tour and ended up going to the very same Patek water they said go say the F word and let it out. There I saw the big dipper and little dipper and also Draco and the other constellations and I also saw a red star on the hospital beside my street and I wanted to see that red star I was supposed to be the star of Bethlehem what was more or less just that a Christmas decoration and I wanted to see you there and I still remember my father saying that's going to be on your bad time. That was before Christmas and I still remember that to this day and I will always remember some good fucking memories. One other good memory I had in Christmas and they always were at Christmas were getting a mobile even though I was six at the time of the planets mercury Venus you name it and I had hung up on above my bed and every night I would look at Jupiter particularly Jupiter and Saturn as I saw those particular planets and Star Trek as a preschooler I was so fascinated by the glow-in-the-dark mobile that I was enjoying it and I never really touched it except with my eyes. I still remember the glee that I had when I saw that under my Christmas present and I unwrapped it and I saw the pictures of the plaza and said it was glow-in-the-dark mobile and I still wanna have a solar system mobile to this day even though I'm fucking 33 years old. Another memory I had was hanging with my nephew and niece Sarah Nissan who were the children of my brother Brian I always love Brian for some odd reason but I love these children Sarah and Nathan we were no older or younger than each other and we would go out at night and have these adventures in the woods out in the end of my property and we either think that king tot was after us or that there was something that was going to attack us or something or a ghost it was very funny run back to the house screaming it was a blast. I didn't think anything of that this was during Halloween as well as Christmas that we would go on these nightly adventures into the woods nowadays with paedophiles and stuff he cannot do that unless you want to commit suicide by paedophile or get hurt my cycle path of some sort you don't have to go onto the wards anymore now you're told me hanging around the lights and only at the lights not near a forest not near anywhere that's dark it's not fun anymore to be a kid. When I remember hearing about that when I was 18 years old obviously ancient compared to eight years old and I was told not to go off on my own or with my friends one trick-or-treating. Bummer I didn't like that and I was just 18 at a time and I was like Scotty is sucking Waze new kids this new generation is living having to be paranoid about these idiots who are going to cause more problems to them and their families these people that go after women and children in the dead of night should be lobotomized and I don't like to say that but they have to be because they cannot rule in the next generations I want the next generation of children to be as happy as I was as happy as Karen was and my nephews and nieces we all lived in a very simpler time before they was charm whatever Internet and other shit that could cause problems. Nowadays I don't use the Internet to cause problems never did always agreed and stock to the terms of services will it be on my space space K or Facebook never whipped out a boob unless it was on a only fans like site or otherwise I've been a good girl online I never made it any worse for any other kid or any other person I made friendly for everyone unless I was her on only fans then that was a designated side for nudity. And I would have the confidence to be safe on those just for fans or only fans size. That I just discovered a year ago and I continue to use those for my nudes everything else clothing on because you never know who is going to work and I don't wanna get in the shit I always stick to the terms and services of everything even with the fansites adult fansites because it's important to stay within the law it's important that everyone enjoys the Internet as much as they can without bullshit. And the fact that there are perverts that are going to abuse Facebook and use it as like a nudity sorry it's like a porn site or something is really stupid I don't like the idea of dick pics or brass or pussy packs. I find that very offensive that people are showing their anatomy on Twitter Facebook spay say and other good sites that really kids could be on and they can see that shit and be traumatized it's also very traumatizing for an adult like me to see a dick or a pussy or a boob that ain't mine. And I don't cut it out with the anatomy. If it's not a adult fansite don't whip it out. But that is what I believe and out as I said I lived in a very simpler time we had still had vinyl records we still had CDs we didn't have shit like Spotify or anything else I could be a bad influence on a kid we actually have good wholesome stuff we had Britney Spears a Backstreet Boys Spice Girls and other shit that I still enjoy to this day I still listen to vinyl records and CDs were on the Internet is out on my group home and that is final. As far as I'm concerned I do not think myself as a very Internet person I might be very good at it very creative with it but I could do without it because I have lived in a simpler time. Where it was a box actual box actual movies actual CDs it made music actual records that made music actual instruments that made music instead of these apps and crap. I believe that we should go back to that simpler time but also have the Internet but the Internet should only be used for research on an entertainment related purpose is not for fucking up a kids head. I haven't learned about cyber bullying until I was about 17 years old that's how simple I am and I have an IQ of 196 but that's because I was raised to be simple and decent. I wasn't raised to love money I wasn't raised to want to make my breasts known all over the Internet even on G rated sites like Facebook and other things I don't make and I do not make stupid stuff. Yes I do have an only fans so yes I do have fans mine and other things that are NSFW yes I have posted NSFW but that is because I am an adult now. And it is for adults only. That being said I live a very simple life as a kid there was nothing like NSFW or any horseshit that was perverted or deviant when I was a kid he go out in the forest at night with a flashlight or not and come back home in one piece as it should be as it should've been in the first place. Whatever happened to the good times.