Loving me forever | book 2 of autosexual confessional ✔️

1999

Someone my more happier moments were before 2001 When I was able to have friends and I wasn't forced to be alone or or to be my myself in a way that was constricting not know whether it's raining there is what it is now but in a way that was horrible. I had happier times at the age of nine years old 1999..... when I was listening the Backstreet Boys Spice Girls and Aqua and all those other wonderful bands that were out there at the time and listening to them and having fun and dancing to the music and stuff and just having a wild time I would usually dance so I can Egyptian and be kind of a nut bar kind of thing but that was what I was interested in back anyways What is astronomy and Egyptology when I was in year 1999 that was also the year that something stupid happened to me that I really kind of regret saying to one girl but it had to happen. I don't usually say this because I'm usually very body positive person, but when you're a 10-year-old at this Time and you are at least 10 years old and you listening to Britney Spears are thinking about Britney Spears hit me baby one more time and the next thing you know you're on your ass on the ground wedged between a snowman and some girl that was well well fed I'll put it that way. I called her every name under the sun and I said every bad word under the sun wine because I broke my clavicle a.k.a. my collarbone at the time I was not too please right now do you think of this right now that I have said demeaning Things to my friends but that's what happened I was so mad I didn't know who what happened or who did Ward house right now as we are both landowner asses and I was in the middle of the sandwiched between her and the snowman.   
I remember it wasn't too bad outside cold wise but it was going to be a pain in the yards for a few months at least because I remember this was that I was in a lot of pain this is the first time I will admit that the zombie felt paying usually the zombie doesn't feel pain and I when I'm talking about the zombie I'm talking about myself because I have such a high pain tolerance. When I think about that shit is that it was so embarrassing that I was swearing like a sailor on leave usually I do swear like a sailor on leave but let's face it was raunchier than usual.........because of the pain.   Yes I didn't po her up for that motherfucker. Excuse my language but that's really what I was I didn't pucker up for that motherfucker meaning the pain of a broken bone that is the worst pain you'll ever feel in your life trust me I have felt all kinds of physical and emotional pain but a broken bone is the bastard.
I remember Skinning mine knees when I was trying to ride my bicycle that didn't hurt too much although it was uncomfortable I know I have had tattoos when I was just a few years younger about 32-33 at this point now and I never fail any pain with any piercings or tattoos but when it comes to this shit a broken bone I was a pain in my parents house of Payne everyone's ass and I was not very nice to anyone I was royally the bitch.
But then the good time to start a roll again when I was able to heal properly and was able to get back on my feet I was able to dance the Egyptian dance to Britney Spears hit me baby one more time another hits at that time I can't remember what they were but they were backstreet boys in a lot of stuff at my friends Karen's particularly my best friend Karen's 10th birthday party I was very nice to her but the chubby girl was there and I didn't know what to say awkward.
But then things started to change for the beginning of the good at first when I was in fifth grade I was still listening to pop in some metal. And I wanted to learn about the Arabic language and I wanted to learn more about Egyptology and stuff but I found it very interesting When I found out I was going to morocco in Arabic country I found that was just the cats miaow and I found myself having a complete can of monkeys there I was enjoying myself right left and Sandra even got a Cousy hat from a Berber person. Which kind of embarrassed my father at the time because he was afraid that the person was probably an extremist but the person was actually nice.
The one thing I do remember what is 2001 what is when things started to go completely downhill and everything went wrong from beginning of the school year with needing glasses up till 911 and right till the time when I ended up being accused of everything under the sun because of my DNA even though I think those idiot friends of mine had Arab radar I didn't know what to think but it was what it was. I was down and determined to find myself in anyway and what I had to do was pull pranks to prove that I was not a stupid bastard or anything of that matter instead I had to punch people out I had a show that I had of me showing respect to only to be threatened with Guantánamo Bay. At that time that was by my principal and my mother was having a shit fit over that if I remember her correctly screaming her head off it's a wonder if she didn't die of embarrassment or die I was screaming from that experience there because she was really riled up like a scorpion. I did not know what I think at the time but thinking that she was going to blow her head off somehow by yelling.
So I chose to be in the martial arts and shows to be in the yakuzia and that was the only way I was going to get me to straighten up and fly ride that was the only way that I was going to fly right and it's me getting my life on track by the time I was in high school even though I was getting in the shit fights I was still getting the respect I deserve and I was able to get the school work done in peace without any shit heads getting in the way. It was a wonderful time in grade 9 when I didn't have to deal with too many bullies.   Of course it would be the odd crackhead or meth head they would call me a retard or something to that effect that I just didn't like and I would lambaste him and I would be a prize not know that it was going to be a mental illness the crackhead in the meth head.  
Grade 10 things start to go down here even more again because people are starting to get on my nerves and they were starting to really ramp up the abuse again because there was another ethnic girl of Arab girl named Radha who is going to be more or less bully she was called a paki and and stupid Arab and all those lovely fucking names that I wish I never heard in my fucking new year but anyways Trying to get out of that I had to exclude some people out of my life because I do not like hearing paki and retard Arab anymore even though it was directed to someone else it was still a pain in the ass for me to deal with. I don't know how many people I had a beat up in the first place over this girl.  Because she wouldn't defend her self.