BOTW Modern AU Chat Fic

Interlude: A Perfectly Normal Lunch at Cracker Barrel

//Author's Note: This is a one-shot detailing what happened at the group's lunch, enjoy! Please note that this includes spoilers for Harry Potter and The Halfblood Prince (Btw I do not support jkr's transphobia)//

It seemed like a fine idea. A great idea, even. Mipha hadn't seen her brother since she started college. Zelda and Link missed him, too. Daruk and Urbosa hadn't met him at all. And everyone loves eating all-day breakfast and pancakes. But the moment Link came stumbling into the Cracker Barrel with dark bags under his eyes and his―what, tenth?―coffee in hand, she was starting to rethink this a little. Especially since they were currently standing in the middle of what was basically a candy shop and toy store combined, with real-life Wonka bars and those plush weasels attached to battery-powered balls and....Santa. No other holiday decorations, just a three-foot tall Santa. In November. And if it was one thing Mipha knew, it was that Link was banned from every candy shop and toy store and Santa in the entire city. So this probably wasn't going to end well.

"Hey, Link!" Sidon called out while waving his hands, catching Link's attention. Well, as much as you can catch the attention of someone who barely slept the night before. He looked a bit dazed, and likely way too caffeinated. Mipha was already scratching 'Cracker Barrel' off the list of restaurants Link wasn't banned from when he threw his arms around Sidon.

"Nice to see you, Sidon!" Link pulled hard against Sidon's waist, trying to pick him up, but Sidon didn't lift an inch.

"I don't think that's gonna work.....I'm not six anymore."

"Just....give me a moment.....I can do it....."

"Don't hurt yourself, Link." Zelda came up behind him, shaking her head like a disappointed parent and sounding pretty tired as well. In fact, who in their group wasn't tired? Between the bird snoring on top of the Lecture Hall, Sidon's plane arriving at the crack of dawn, and whatever Purah and Zelda were doing when they microwaved a potato last night, it seemed like everyone was exhausted. Even Daruk hadn't slept well because of some guy next door binging Demon Slayer on full-blast. At least he knew all the lyrics to Gurenge now.

Speaking of which....there was Daruk, with Urbosa―who must have been the only well-rested person in their ensemble―right behind. Great. The whole group was together. Next they needed a table, and then to eat without anything weird happening, and maybe, just maybe, they wouldn't be banned from Cracker Barrel. What a miracle that would be.

"Oh, I've heard about you before!" Mipha turned back to the others, who were well into introductions by now. Sidon was staring at Urbosa, seemingly impressed that there was anyone taller than him (Sidon was pretty proud of his height). "You're friends with Zelda's family, right?"

Just as Urbosa nodded and was about to explain her relations with them, the waitress came back to the counter and ushered them into the seating area. Perfect. They were on record time. No damages, no screaming, no getting kicked out before they could eat. That was when Sidon tugged on her arm.

"Hey, sis, can I get one of those before we eat?"

Mipha looked where he was pointing and rolled her eyes, but gave in. What harm could it cause?

And so, that's how they all ended up seated in a bustling Cracker Barrel with a plush weasel-on-a-ball toy spinning around on the wooden table.

"I'm gonna name him Dumbledore," Sidon said proudly.

Zelda cocked her head to the side. "Why Dumbledore? Why not Flash, or Stripes, or....." She sniffed at the spinning weasel. "'The smell of battery acid'. That rolls off the tongue. Kind of."

"He just looks like a Dumbledore."

"Don't let him near the edge of the table or he'll end up like Dumbledore," Link mumbled with a sly smile. Zelda elbowed him at the bad joke, and Daruk eyes went wide.