don't blame me - conrad fisher DISCONTINUED

chapter eight

juliana's pov

it takes a minute for me to fully realize what i had just said and done.

i kissed conrad, and told him why i came out there on the porch.

to finally do what i've wanted the day i first saw you.

"what stopped you from doing that sooner?" the boy i had just kissed asks me.

i quickly stand up, the actions of what i had just done fully sinking in.

"do not. and i mean do not tell anyone about what just happened, okay?" i say stirnly.

i need to put an end to this before it can even begin.

"wait. what?" conrad says confused

"did you not hear me?"

"uh yeah, yeah i won't. don't worry about it, jules."

he looks at me like his heart was shattered. i feel awful, but i know this is for the better. i cannot hurt the ones i love just to be loved by another.

i walk away into the beach house, maybe i should go talk to belly. but i physically can't, my betrayal to her would be written all over my face. so instead i head to my room, getting into bed. laying down, i feel like i had betrayed myself in some sort of way.

∞༺♥༻✧

conrad's pov

i sit there on the porch feeling like some part of me has been taken away. but i should've known this would happen. why would a girl like her fall for some idiot, lowlife like me? i could only ever bring her down. she needs to be someone who will lift her up and bring her happiness.

i somehow find the strength to walk to my room and fall asleep.

∞༺♥༻✧

juliana's pov

i walk into belly's room shaking her awake.

she stirs a bit before her eyes open.

"happy birthday bels," i say to her excited. "you're finally sixteen! how does it feel?"

she sits her self up on her bed and goes, "how about you ask me that question once i eat?"

she's never been a morning person, and neither have i. i just want her birthday to be perfect, and i don't want her to find out how badly i betrayed her.

i plaster on a smile and drag her out of bed.

∞༺♥༻✧

i never truly liked birthdays, well more exactly my own. it always felt somehow fake, everyone putting on a front pretending to like me by telling me happy birthday. it was never a special day to me, my family didn't really care, and my dad never even remembered it. due to that, i always wanted belly to feel like her birthday was something she enjoyed. i would never in a million years want her to feel so alone on a day where she should be celebrated.

susannah brings belly into a hug telling her how beautiful she looks. there's a chorus of happy birthdays that follow.

"happy sweet sixteen bells," jere says pulling bels into a hug.

"now belly button's getting old finally" steven says to his little sister, "happy birthday."

"happy birthday sweetheart." laurel hugs her daughter. "your mickey pancakes are almost ready."