His Redemption

CHAPTER 19

NAZREEN’S POV.

This time he gulps the looks at me straight in my eyes as he answers “You and Anwar have a son”.

“Am sorry Aziz, can you please repeat what you’ve just said, my ears seem to be hearing weird things” I ask Aziz, but the blank expression on his face clearly portraits it that I’ve heard him quite well and what I heard is correct. “Aziz, you’re kidding right” I nervously laugh hoping he really is just joking as his way of trying to take my mind off the danger at hand. As it is truly impossible for me and Anwar to have a child together, since I never got to give birth to the child that I was carrying.

The silence prevails on the room as each of us lost in their own thoughts, however, my thoughts come to an end abruptly as I feel a certain warmth enveloping my right hand that had been on top of my lap making my eyes look at what’s enveloping by hand only to find Aziz kneeling in front of me with both his hands enclosed my right one and his eyes looking at mine. Aziz opens his mouth then closes it, it’s as if he’s contemplating on what to say. His eyes keep on moving around the room not once making eye contact with me, this can only mean on thing and that is whatever he is about to tell is something huge and I might not like it at all.

Suddenly his eyes meet mine and he swallows hard making his Adam apple move on his throat then he sighs and this time when he opens his mouth to speak I know that he has already made up his mind on how to tell me and this only increases my nervousness and anxiety making both my left and right hand that is still enclosed between his to shake “Nazzy we need to talk…. You truly do have a son with Anwar” .

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It has been a week since I had been told everything about my child and of how Humayra and that vile human did to me and Anwar though, Anwar is not a victim in this plot, I deny to believe that he is, the way he handled things wasn’t right, instead of trusting me. He did the opposite, he destroyed my life and that of my child, “Nazzy, he’s here” Aziz voice comes through the hazy fog my jumbled up thoughts.

On the outside I looked calm and collected however, on the inside it was some other thing, it’s like a I have a battle going on me and the havoc it creates leads to questions like, will he love me, will he accept me, is he going to hate me or is he going to be scared of me.

“Aziz, am scared, wwhat iff ii don’t meet hhhe’s expectations, that he wants his mother to have?” I nervously ask Aziz, with my gaze moving from the mantle to look up at him. Aziz sighs before I know it he’s pulling me up from where I was sitting to his lap and lays my head on his chest with his hand patting my back and the other one securely holds me around my waist.

“Nazzy, I know you’re scared, I also know that your nervous and don’t want to show it, but what I can tell you is that, you’re an amazing and strong woman, and your child will love and be proud of you just like the way I love you” he says, and then he pulls my face from his chest and turns me to face him as he stares at my eyes “I want you to give him a chance, that little boy has been excited to meet you and to get to know you from the moment he learned about you” he adds still looking at his eyes I can clearly see the love and trust that he has on me, I nod meekly indicating that I am ready to meet my son. Honestly never have I ever been happy in my life other than knowing that I have a child, my son, but at the same time am sad too, because I’ve missed a lot in his life, from he’s first word. To crawling and walking. But I promised myself and him that, I might’ve not known about him sooner but I sure as hell am going to be in his life from now onwards no matter what. I already love him so much.

Getting up from Aziz’s lap and look at him who is still seating down on the chair, I forward my hand to him urging him to take and without missing a beat he does encircling his much larger hand on mine then he gets up.

We walk and in hand together to the front door and I open it only for my eyes to clash with those that are so similar to mine.

“Hello, son” I say to the bluish-green eyed child that is staring at me. He’s almost as tall as me, I guess he’s taking after his father, who is currently standing behind his son. Looking at the boy in front of me who is still staring at me with an emotion that is similar to love. What he did next is something completely took me off guard as never had I ever expected him to ran straight up to me and embrace me with such a force that, if it wasn’t for Aziz holding me. I would’ve fallen down along with my son who is hugging me so tightly with his head near my chest.

What I felt in that moment isn’t something I have ever felt for anyone else, even when I loved Anwar, never have I ever felt such love, peace, trust, faith, courage and strength than what I felt when this innocent human being held me tightly. I couldn’t help the tears that ran on my face.

when he stepped out of our embrace, he stood before me looking at me straight in the eye, making me nervous of my scar as I had just loosely thrown the hijab on my head so he can actually see my scar. By each second that passed I started to get scared that, he won’t accept me. Who am I kidding no one will accept me with my scars and a limp. I will be nothing but an embarrassment to him.

I Shakily moved my hands to the hijab with the intention to cover it well and hide the scar. As my hands start to move the hijab, a hand stops me “don’t hide mama” my heart beat increases as my son’s eyes look at me with love and adoration then he moves his hand from mine.

“mama, I love you so much, you’re so beautiful and am proud to have a mother like you, I have been so excited to meet you from the day I learned that Humayra was not my actual mother” he says as he moves to hug me again.

My eyes welled up with tears and with such a happiness and fondness no one in this world can ever imagine. I felt happy because my own flesh and blood accepted me with all my flows. “I promise you mama, no one can ever take me away from you ever again” his voice comes out muffled as he’s face is on my chest.

'And I promise you my son, nothing and no one in this world is ever going to hurt you nor take you from me ever again’ I promise him silently, and this time whoever tries to hurt him then by the promise of the almighty I’ll make them suffer.