Chapter 63- Remorse

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   It had been a week already since I had visited the doctor and I could feel my arm start to heal already, even tho the pain never really stopped. The biggest struggle where taking notes so I started carrying my laptop around and taking notes there. I found that eating wasn't that difficult since I adapted the technique really quickly with my left arm, but sometimes it got a little difficult. Tho sometimes I forgot that I couldn't use my right arm and I started doing stuff with it, like carrying something heavy and Weems constantly reminded me that it was bad to do so.

When my classes ended I went to Weems office because she had texted me to do so. "Heyyy, what's up!?" I asked as I stepped into her office. "Hi, could you please come closer, I have to tell you something." She said scooting with her chair away from the desk. "Mmm? What is it, my pretty lady?" I asked as I walked up to her and sat on her lap. "First let me kiss you." She said with a warm smile before leaning in and kissing me. Larissa never disappointed me with her passionate kisses but today I wanted more so I dragged my lips away from her down to her neck. I started kissing her neck and Larissa leaned back her neck and whispered: "We can't, not now...I-I have to take you...to...to your therapy session now." 

   And as she said that I immediately pulled my lips away from her:" What? No! I won't go!" I stood up from Weems lap agitated. "She called me personally Y/n, and told me she wanted to speak to you, so get your bag and let's go." She said standing up from her chair. "Now?" I asked for this so sudden announcement. "Yes! Now." She replied calmly but I could feel the seriousness in her voice. "What if I refuse to go...?" I asked. "Well, I will have to drag you there by force...Look, I don't want to make you do this, but you need to talk to her about what happened that day you beat up that man." She said and I got an idea. "Fine...I will go." I said but in reality, when Weems will drop me off in Jericho, I at the right moment will just walk away when Weems won't be looking. "Okay then... let's go." She said and walked up to me and gave me a little kiss on my forehead. But then we both left.

   The whole car ride was silent because I was planning the right moment when to sneak off so Weems wouldn't notice me, and my plan was simple. When we got to Jericho she drove right up to the building, as I was already expecting, and while unbuckling my seatbelt I said: ''Don't wait for me, I will walk back to Nevermore, I haven't been on a long walk recently.'' I said crossing my fingers behind my back, hoping that she would agree. ''Well, I was hoping that we could go on a walk together after your session.'' She replied. ''Fuck! I really want to go on a walk with her...but not today.'' I thought to myself before I quickly replied to Weems's idea. ''It would be nice, but we can do it another day, I have some stuff to think about.'' It was painful to reject her sweet offer due to my selfish reasons, but Weems was the reason I go to this crazy lady anyways. ''Well okay, then I will go back.'' I could see Weems smile disappear off her face and I felt really bad, I wanted to hop back in the car, kiss her and tell her that we can go on as many walks as she pleases, but I didn't, I simply nodded with my head and closed the doors and watched Weems drive off, until dispersing away from my sight. 

   As I tried to block the sad thought from taking my emotions whole, I turned away from the building I really hated and walked away. It felt good not to go to that therapy session, it was like my own sort of therapy treatment, and in the meantime, while I was supposed to be talking about my feeling I  walked around the city listening to music. When it was finally time to go back to Nevermore I spotted Josh and quickly walked up behind him. ''Hey!'' I said trying to get his attention. ''Oh, Y/n...hi.'' He quietly said with his head down, not giving me any glances. ''I was just going back to Nevermore, maybe you wanna walk with me and we could talk about what happened that day because you have been ignoring my texts and calls,'' I said because for the past week, I had tried to reach him, but without any luck. ''Umm...okay, yea we should probably talk.'' He replied and we started walking in Nevermore's direction. 

   We walked back to Nevermore and in conclusion, we decided to continue our friendship but if we would feel too much tension between us, we might cut it off or take a big break. Then we spilt off, Josh took the bus back to Jericho and I went back to Nevermore. I put my jacket down in my dorm and went to Weems's office to spend some quality time with her but the moment I stepped in I felt that the atmosphere was off. 

   ''Dr. Kimbott called...she told me you didn't show up today, and don't lie, tell me the truth!'' Weems said while sitting on the sofa watching the fire burning in the fireplace. ''Yes, I wasn't, only because I don't need to,'' I replied standing still not moving a muscle feeling all my emotions coming back to me. ''You? Don't need it?'' She stood up and faced me with a disappointed look, ''so you think you are all fine, despite beating a man up?'' ''YES! Yes, I AM!'' I snapped, ''I don't need therapy, I am fine now, I deal with my emotions differently, I deal with them alone, and I have dealt with them and now everything is fine! And you don't get it! I beat that man up because he deserved it...'' I calmed down a bit and continued, ''please...trust me that I am fine. Please don't make me go to therapy, which I well know isn't helping me much at all...please...I am begging you! I WILL DROP ON MY KNEES FOR YOU TO ONLY BELIEVE ME!'' I said as a single tear ran down my cheek, I needed Weems to trust me, to believe me that I was fine. 

   The Weems walked up to me and placed her hand under my chin lightly lifting my head. ''You are begging? Huh? Well, you will have to beg harder.'' Then she searched for some remorse deep into my eyes and so suddenly and unexpectedly started kissing me. 

The angel's voice. Y/n X Larissa Weems secret loveWhere stories live. Discover now