The Light Within Her - Book Nine

Ch. 34- My Fate

"It is a fitting punishment for a monster. To want something so much–to hold it in your arms–and know beyond a doubt you will never deserve it."

***

My eyes fluttered open while the sun above burned my retinas enough to cover them with my palm. I scanned my surroundings and realized I was laying in lush green grass and flowers that tickled my nose. Where was I and why was it so beautiful? I sat up while and looked down to see I still wore the gold wedding gown that Helios gifted me. "Shh, she doesn't know where she's at. Give her a moment." a soft female said from behind me.

My body twisted to face the woman–my eyes widened at the sight of a group watching me with curiosity. But I could speak–could not form the words just yet. "Okay, I understand giving her a second to realize what is happening but she will return to the real world soon. We don't have a lot of time for a debate." a male voice replied calmly as if he was the mediator between the other four.

As I focused on them, I realized I recognized them from the statues in my home. The family I lost in the war–they were standing in front of me. The blonde woman with her hair cut short had her arms placed across her chest, her blue eyes staring at me with so many questions. I opened my mouth in surprise at the sight of Emmeline's mother. Grace Alemont. She was the one that came up with the idea of Solasta Academy, where my uncle Jasper founded it. "Aunt Grace?" I whispered, tears slowly falling down my cheeks.

Then I glimpsed at the other four men. The blond-haired one smirked at me cockily and I recognized him as Jax Collins—my mother's best friend and human who was murdered by Eva. Then at the man with scarlet eyes and pale skin–Kellan Ayelet also known as the Snake. Rosalind's father. Then I stole a glance at the man in a button-up as his hazelnut hair was in a mess on top of his head. Oliver Harrington. Aunt Ellie's past lover. Lastly, I glimpsed at the man with fierce blue eyes and wavy black hair and I knew for sure it was Jesse Davenport. Kalama's Werewolf. If I saw them right now, that meant I was in Hazelthorn. That I was dead. I stood up now as panic reeled in my very soul–where I could not feel my sunlight at all. "No, I cannot be here. It isn't my time to die! I have to get back and save them—"

"You're not dead," Kellen Ayelet interrupted in an angry tone, which made me stop short. "Soari, you used all your powers to destroy the god of darkness. Your body is weak and your soul is close to death, so as long as your uncle repairs your sunlight soon you will return. Before you leave, we want to meet you finally."

"Fuck, at least be nice to her about it," Jax argued, punching Kellan in the arm. Kellan rolled his eyes before pulling his lips into a smirk. Jax faced me now–giving me a slight nod of encouragement. "Soari, you are my hero. Seriously, all those pranks you did in your academy days had me fucking laughing nonstop. Kellan here had to tell me to shut the fuck up a few times because he claimed it was not funny. Of course, Jesse was the only one besides me that found it enjoyable."

"And yet, she did all these pranks at my academy?" Grace waved her hand. "The one Jasper worked tirelessly to build."

"It was not my finest moment, but it was fun at the time," I said as my cheeks reddened. "Though, I never told anyone why I did these pranks, to begin with." No one wanted to know the reason behind my bad behavior. They just figured it was because I was the youngest Princess of Ambrosia and demanded attention from everyone. So I rebelled during my time at Solasta because it was the only way to protect my family.

"I know, Soari," Grace whispered softly. "But he deserves to move on just like everyone else. He deserves to be happy and I think my children can agree with me on it."

Jesse nodded in agreement. "No matter how much it pains me to see your sister move on, I know it is for her own happiness. Jasper deserves the same. So do Zahra and Ellie." Tears streamed down my face in full force, wanting to hug them all. To tell them how much Emmeline and Rosalind grieve for them every day. I wanted to protect them all from the pain–wanted to keep the members of our dead family alive.

I sniffed, wiping my nose quickly while I locked eyes with all of them. "I probably don't have a lot of time before I return back to the land of the living, but Rosalind, Emmeline, and Nyra are the greatest women I know. Did you know that Rosie wears a snake necklace to remember you, Kellan? That Dakota and Meredith finally got married?" I turned toward Grace now. "Emmeline takes care of all of us before herself and most of the time I take it for granted. But I still appreciate her for everything. Nyra hides her grief from everyone but I see it in her eyes sometimes. She loves Kala so much and still talks about you, Jesse." Then to Jax. "My mother compares me to you all the time and I never understood why until now. She will always love you, Jax." Finally, to Oliver. "Aunt Ellie listened to you back then and everyone says she is living her happiest life. Hopefully, I can have that in my own life."

"We have watched them all their life, Soari." Grace smiled. "And we are proud of them for everything they accomplished."

Jax turned his attention to Kellan, taking his hand in a firm grasp. My eyebrow raised at the sight, wanting to comment on it but decided to keep quiet. People move on–even in the afterlife and I was happy for the two. "Should we tell her?"

"Tell me what?" I inquired.

"Jax, there is nothing she can do now. It's in the Law's hands." Oliver replied. "No one, not even the King himself, can stop it. What's done is done."

My heart beat rapidly against my chest, even though I was technically dead. Tears streamed down my face even more while I kept shaking my head. My body seemed to be pulling every which way as it was slowly leaving Hazelthorn. No, not yet. I cannot leave now. I need answers from my family–needed to tell them how much I admire their bravery and love for my best friends. I needed them to know that I kept their memory alive even when I didn't know them personally. That all the shit I did back in the academy was to protect my uncle from that crazy bitch principal–even if they knew everything about it. But I just did not have enough time. I never did.

While I was disappearing from Hazelthorn, one thought was on mine. What did Amias Guinivere do while I was dead? Was he stupid enough to reveal everything we kept secret or was it because of his confession during the wedding? It had to be. I knew his fate was sealed when he stood up at my wedding. He was going into the slammer for all eternity because of me.

One second, my feet were standing in lush grass and flowers of all colors. The next, my back was laying on a hospital bed while an oxygen tube seeped into my nostrils. My breath was rabid and my eyes wild with panic as I scanned my environment for a sight of Amias. Relief flooded through my entire body as he sat next to me with blood-stained eyes. He was crying. But I knew within seconds that he was not only crying because I woke up. He was in pain because it would be the last time we would be this close to each other.

I thought I won. I thought for sure all the pain was in the past. Yet, this pain was ten times worse than being trapped with Erebus. So much worse.