𝐑𝐞𝐝𝐚𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐲 - Maze Runner, Newt

Chapter twenty-two - Show Him

After breakfast I walked towards the med-hut. None of the other Med-jacks were there, so I sat down and waited for anyone to come in. A little bored I stared at the table and my thoughts drifted off.

Is Logan really telling the truth about Newt liking me? I don't know. Maybe Newt is just nice to me because we're friends. Maybe he doesn't even like me at all, but feels forced to hang out with me. No! I know he likes me, in a friend way at least. But he's not in love with me.

'Nora?' Someone snapped their fingers and I looked up.

'Yes?' I looked at Clint and Jeff.

'We just wanted to know if you were still alive.' Jeff replied. 'You were just staring at the table.'

'It's a nice table.' I shrugged.

'What were you thinkin' about?' Clint asked.

'Nothing special.' I answered.

'Alright.' The two boys started working and so did I.

While treating a Slicer I slowly zoned out. I thought about my memories and my past. I had a cousin and wondered were he was. I wondered if he would ever come up in the Box too. I thought about Newt's sister, where she was right now and if Newt ever got to see her again.

'Hey.' Someone shook my shoulder and I got snapped out of my thoughts. 'You okay?' Clint looked at me, so did Jeff and the Slicer.

'Yeah.' I started treating the Slicer's cut again, but felt Clint and Jeff eyes burning on me.

After a while the Slicer was all done and he got to work again. 'Nora.' Clint sat down on the chair in front of me. 'You okay? You seem a little off.'

'I'm fine.' I lied. 'I'm gonna get lunch.' I quickly got up and walked out of the med-hut, leaving Clint and Jeff behind.

I walked over to the kitchen and waited in the line. 'Thanks, Fry.' I smiled when he handed me the food. I sat down next to Minho and across from Newt.

'Hey, Greenie.' Minho greeted.

'Hi. When are you gonna stop calling me that?' I asked a little annoyed.

'When there's a new Greenie. That'll be..' Minho thought for a second. 'In two days.'

'Okay.' I sighed and started eating. Suddenly I felt something wet drip down on my hand. A little confused I looked at my hand and saw red blood dripping down from my wrist. I quickly put my hand under the table and tried to act normal. When I looked up Newt was staring at me.

'Are you okay?' He asked, concerned.

'Yeah.' I quickly nodded.

'You are bleeding.' Newt said. My heart started beating faster when he made the comment. I didn't know what to say, because if I lied he would ask to see my arm. I didn't reply and ate my food as fast as possible.

'I'm done.' I got up, but Newt had to grab my wrist again, the one with the cuts. I flinched and a small wince escaped my mouth. Newt didn't let go this time. 'Newt,' I quietly said. 'You're hurting me.' Tears formed in my eyes, but not because of the pain. I was scared Newt would find out about the cuts soon.

Eventually Newt let go and he stared at my hand, which was still covered with some blood. 'What happened?' He asked.

'Nothing.' I felt guilty for lying, but quickly walked away. Rubbing my eyes I entered the med-hut. Jeff and Clint weren't there yet, so I could look at my wrist. One of the cuts was open again and some blood was dripping out. I cleaned it up fastly and sat down on a chair right on time, because Clint and Jeff walked in.

'Hey.' I said, voice cracking.

'Hey.' The two boys sat down and we waited for someone to walk in. A little bored I leaned my head on my hand and stared at the wall.

After a long day it was finally time for dinner. I got myself some food and looked around. My eye caught Newt and Minho and I wanted to join them, but was scared they were gonna ask about the blood. I noticed Gally and Mike sitting somewhere, so I walked over to them.

'Mind if I sit down?' I asked. The two boys shaked their head and I sat down. 'How are you?'

'I'm great, thanks.' Mike replied.

'It's alright. What about you?' Gally looked at me.

'Fine.' I answered.

~

When I arrived in my own hut, someone knocked on the door. 'Come in.' I said.

The door opened and Newt walked in my hut. Immediately I was scared he was gonna find out about my cuts, but somehow I felt comfortable too.

'Hey.' Newt sat down next to me. 'How are you?'

'I'm fine, thanks. You?' I asked, quickly changing the subject to Newt instead of me.

'I'm good.' Newt paused for a second. 'How are you really?' He asked again.

'I said I was fine.' I sighed and bit my lip.

'Obviously you are not.' Newt replied and I looked down. 'Nora,' Newt started. 'Show me your wrist.'

My stomach dropped and my breath hitched. 'What?' My voice cracked.

'Show me your wrist.'

'Why?' I acted like I didn't know what he was talking about, even though my heart was beating like crazy.

'Just do it.' Newt replied. 'Please.' He added.

Unsure I showed him my right wrist, the one without cuts. Newt let out a small sigh of relief and looked at me again. 'The other one?'

I bit my lip until I tasted blood in my mouth.

'Nora.' Newt said when I didn't react.

'You already saw one, why do you need to see both?' My voice was hoarse. I wanted to stop cutting. I wanted to get help, but I was scared Newt was gonna judge me or think I was weak. I was scared he was going to find out about my memories. I wanted to tell him all of it so badly, but it hurt.

'Please just show me.' Newt's voice cracked a little.

Slowly I rolled up my sleeve and turned my head away from Newt. I heard a small gasp and after that it was completely silent. Quickly I covered my wrist again and averted my eyes from Newt. Tears formed in my eyes as I felt ashamed and guilty.

Newt didn't say anything and I was scared that he was angry, until he wrapped his arms around me. Hesitantly I hugged him back and I felt comfortable. Tears started streaming down my face while Newt rubbed my back gently.

'I'm sorry.' I sobbed trough my cries.

'It's okay.' Newt comforted me. 'It's gonna be alright.'

We stayed in this position for several minutes. Me sobbing into Newt shoulder while he hugged me.

After a while I let go off Newt and looked down.

'Why have you been doing that?' Newt asked, voice still cracking.

'I-I felt guilty. I got some memories and didn't want to-' I felt my eyes get watery again.

'Hey, we'll talk about this later, okay?' Newt interrupted me and lifted up my chin. Our eyes met and for a second I was in a trance, because of his eyes. 'Go to sleep, love.' Newt gently said. I nodded and Newt turned around so I could change in my pyjamas. Instead of wearing a long sleeved sweater I put on a shirt

'Done.' I said. Newt turned around and looked at me for a second.

'Great.' Newt walked over to my bed and motioned for me to get in. I did and unexpected Newt lay down next to me. He moved closer to me and gently grabbed my wrist. 'Don't do it again, okay? If you feel like you're gonna do it just come to me.' I could only nod in response. Slowly Newt moved his face closer to my wrist and he placed a kiss right on top of the scars. A warm feeling flowed trough my whole body at his touch, and slowly I fell asleep.