When All is Lost

Chapter 45

I was marched right back to Gertie. Despite being unarmed and willingly keeping my hands high above my head, I had no fewer than three guns trained on me the whole way there. I was then forced to wait outside of the greenhouse like a naughty child waiting to see the school's principal.

A man I didn't recognize went inside to tell Gertie what I'd done, leaving me alone with four very stern-looking guards. My adrenaline had given me a boost of energy, but the longer I waited outside the glass doors, the more my rush faded and I was feeling the exhaustion creep in all the way to my bones.

It seemed like forever before the glass doors opened and I was practically shoved inside. Gertie stood in her usual spot, but unlike the times before, she was holding her gun rather than tending to her plants.

"What-" Her shrill voice echoed around the space before she took a deep breath and tried again, "what have you done?"

A prickle of anger made me lower my hands. "I did what needed to be done."

Gertie shook her head. "No. Not here. Not in my house. You don't get to make those kinds of decisions here."

I glared at her. "I didn't see anyone else stepping up-"

"Did you even give them a chance?" Gertie looked at me as though she was truly stunned. "My Lord. Why? Why did you do it?"

"Do what?" My anger burned bright and I couldn't contain it. "Save another member of your group? Because that is exactly what I did."

Gertie became quiet, letting a few moments of silence settle between us. "Tell me your side of what happened."

"One of the new guys you brought in cracked. He asked for a guard to take him to the bathroom and as he was passing by my stall, he pulled a weapon on Big Al."

If Gertie had any feelings about what I was sharing, she wasn't revealing them. She kept her face void of expression as she watched me. "What kind of weapon?" she asked plainly.

"I don't know. It was small and sharp. Maybe a nail file?"

Gertie nodded and I could assume my story was matching whatever one she'd already heard. "What happened next?"

"The guy kept demanding for Big Al to hand over his gun. Your people started holding him up and his friends were telling him to stop, but he was past being reasoned with."

"How do you know that?"

I looked at Gertie, feeling utterly flabbergasted. "He was only getting more and more worked up."

"He was scared."

"Of course he was," I yelled, throwing my hand up in exasperation. "But was Big Al supposed to die for that?"

"Did you try to talk to him?" Gertie's gaze bore through me in a way that made my skin itch. "Did you say a single word of comfort?"

I felt my cheeks heat. "I couldn't risk Big Al's life."

Gertie put her gun down on the table in front of her, letting her fingers simply rest on it. "And while I thank you for that, you took someone's life without even thinking twice about it. You didn't give my people a chance to handle the boy. He could have been reasoned with."

"How do you know that?" I snapped.

Gertie slapped her hands down. "How do you? How are you so sure you made the right decision?"

"You don't know what it means to lose people!" I accused.

Gertie raised her chin ever so slightly. "The hell I don't-"