Blood In The Water | Juliette Ferras

I Hate And Love Everything

I am going to kill my brother. How dare he. I don't know where he got the audacity to do this to me. I am his equal. Not his second-in-command. I am in command.

He's not in his office. He's not in the simulation chamber—thanks the gods. But I don't know where he is. I think of all his usual hiding spots, but none of them reveal to me where he is.

I'm about to go back to listening when I make the connection.

I travel back to Julia's room—or rather the sisters' room now that Aaron has allowed them to sleep together again.

Sure enough, my brother is leaning at the doorframe, staring down Julia as Juliette plays with her hands on her bed. I duck underneath his arm, now standing in the space between him and Julia.

Aaron flinches like he's been caught.

"Warner," I seethe, remembering myself in the present company. "What the hell do you think you're doing."

"What?"

Julia grins like she's enjoying this. I don't know if she's the kind of creature that thrives on chaos, or if she just delights in seeing my brother flustered.

I ignore Julia's crackles and give Aaron a blank glare. "You assigned a soldier to watch me?"

He swallows and thinks. "Yes."

I take a step back. I expected more from him. Why would he have someone watch my every move as though I was under his command?

"Care to explain yourself?" I ask, crossing my arms.

"It's not about watching you," my brother explains. "It's about watching out for you."

My stomach drops. "He's here?"

"Tonight."

I hold my tongue. I know my brother is only looking out for me. He doesn't want me to be there when he shows up; Because that's when our presents arrive.

And they're seldom good.

"Who's the soldier?" I ask.

"Kishimoto."

Now I'm mad. My father will rip him to shreds. To Aaron, Kenji is just another soldier, but I fear what will happen to him if I told Aaron the truth.

That Kenji was there for me during my panic attacks.

That Kenji never failed to make me laugh.

That Kenji was my best friend.

But instead, I focus on what I can control; On what I do know. My brother is protecting me. I nod to Aaron and grasp his hand as I exit the room. The sisters stare at the gesture as if my touching someone with this much care was never supposed to come into fruition.

"Thank you."

The look of pure shock continues. I know. I never say those words to anyone.

________________________________________________________________________________

Kenji distracts me for the rest of the day. His words are laced with humor and sarcastic comments. I almost forget that I'm supposed to call him a soldier—a mindless robot for me to push around.

We travel in groups, hiding behind walls and training equipment so that the security cameras don't catch sight of us. Eventually, we stop at my bedroom and close the door. While Kenji relaxes, I do not. I fear that my father—or a loyal soldier will walk in and assume the worst.

Especially because of Kenji's predicament.

"How's Castle?" I ask, smashing one of my stray pillows directly at Kenji's face. He stops messing up my duvet and sinks into the plush mattress.

"It's soooooo comfy," he drawls, muffled words coming out of the pillow.

I smack him again. "How. Is. Castle?"

I caught Kenji on numerous accounts paging an external source. It was at the beginning of our friendship, so I had threatened to gut him with a machete. I was going to turn him in, but there was something in the way he begged me that caused a pang of sympathy to ricochet across my body.

There were kids at Omega Point.

There were kids.

I couldn't turn Kenji in for protecting people like me, but I didn't tell him that. He doesn't know of my powers.

No one does.

Not my father.

Not my brother.

No one.

If Kenji does find out, he'll never look at me the same. He would start to look at me like the monster I am.

There's a knock on the door.

I haul Kenji up from my bed and smooth out the wrinkles on the bedsheet. Then I slap him, hard. I run to the door before he can react so that when my father enters, the first thing he sees is Kenji on the ground—doubling over in pain.

"I don't want to see you abandon your post again, soldier," My tongue goes numb at the word. "Is that clear?"

Kenji already has a bruise forming on his pale cheek. He smiles weakly at me as he passes. "Yes."

He understands. I am so grateful he understands.

I turn around to face my father as he shuts the door behind Kenji's retreating figure. "We need to talk."

________________________________________________________________________________

One hostile comment was enough for my father to strike me across the face sixteen times. I have dark slashes across my chest from the letter opener on my desk.

I reach over and grab the metal blade, tossing it into the wastepaper bin. I don't want to see it again.

I grab a first aid kit that I keep stored underneath my bed and take out some gauze. I cut them into strips and bind them over the back of my neck so that they remain hidden underneath my suit.

When my brother enters the room, I'm sitting on my bed and staring at a notch in the wall. I haven't moved for hours, yet somehow it feels as though my mind has traveled to thousands of dark places and has remained there for a long time.

My brother just stands next to me and asks one simple question.

"Did you do that?"

I blink. It feels as though my eyes have finally closed and don't feel like opening anytime soon. I answer once they have opened again. "Yes."