Naruto is (not) an idiot [RECONTINUED!]

CH. 1

"Hokage-sama!"

Four unnamed ninjas run into the office of Hiruzen, the Third Hokage.

"What is it this time, some stunt pulled by Naruto?"

Hiruzen was accustomed to Naruto's shenanigans, although occasionally frustrating, they were light-hearted.

One ninja stepped forward to report to the Hokage. "Sir, Naruto is stealing potted plants from the stores in the square, over four dozen stores have reported either missing or damaged property."

Hiruzen let out a deep sigh. Naruto... why steal when you could shatter, then I could give you a talking to... well so long to a paperwork-free afternoon. "Where's Iruka?"

The foremost ninja spoke again. "Iruka is currently tending to his class. Naruto didn't show up today." Hiruzen cracked a smile. He knew that Naruto had nothing to gain from the plants... but he did have something to gain from their running Shinobi.

Naruto has pulled hundreds of 'pranks', all of which could be easily repaired or weren't damaging in the first place. Comedy was an objective, the attention was a plus... the purpose was to be chased, to run.

 At first, it was just villagers, but then it escalated. None of the villagers could catch him, not with speed, not with traps, not with bribes, nothing would dissuade him. Hiruzen had to send out Genin. GENIN! Full-fledged ninja, regardless of experience, where needed to catch Naruto!

Even that wasn't enough! After another hundred or so chases, he learned the operation system of Genin! How does a damn 7-year-old do that?! Soon Genin could catch him alone. They had to go in full teams! It took three Genin at their strongest to catch him!

Nowadays, only the elite teams of Genin can even hope to catch him. He has to send out Chunin. A FUCKING CHUNIN! A shinobi that often has seen more death and fighting than a thousand Genin! He can actually put up a chase! It's not instant! He can still outrun them.

Even if it's just one- still...

*sigh* "I'll go talk to him. If he's going this far out of his way, he must be trying to get our attention." The lead ninja nods, and as he does the three behind him disappear. "Please tell him to stop pulling pranks on the civilians, they're starting to get... aggressive again."

Hiruzen scoffed at the note. Like they could hurt him at this point... besides they're not stupid enough for that... not after what I did to that bastard merchant for sending his thugs to... deal with Naruto. 

"We both know they're not that stupid, at least not after I gave that... example." The ANBU nodded and Shunshined away as Hiruzen finished the tobacco in his pipe. 

"Anbu." The second the words left Hiruzen's lips five ninjas clad in black, all with masks of various origins kneeled in front of him. "I'll be going to get Naruto. I suspect he is training himself by getting villagers and Shinobi to chase him. If this is the case, I'm going to train him personally, so long as he promises to keep out of trouble." The anbu nod and dash off to their respective positions, as they do Hiruzen disappears in a bloom of smoke and ash.

Hiruzen had remembered that Naruto was in the forest of death, a frequent for his training. Naruto was the only one besides Anko that went there willingly. There was another presence next to Naruto however, at first he thought it was Anko because of the suppressed evil, but it wasn't.

 "I recognize that chakra... it's Mizuki. Why is he out here with Naruto? Did he already find him? Why does he feel like-? Oh no!" Hiruzen came to a realization, he pushed as much chakra into his legs as he could before rocketing off to the pair. He felt Mizuki's chakra was... wrong. A henge.

Mizuki was henged as the Third Hokage and was taking something from Naruto. 'Hiruzen' spoke to Naruto. "Thank you for doing this exercise, after seeing your skills as a shinobi I can agree to train you in the basics." Naruto began to beam, not at 'Hiruzen's' claim, but at the real Hokage behind him.

"Good afternoon, Mizuki." Mizuki shot around only to meet a fist to the gut. "I can feel the aura of snakes coming off of you. How dare you ally yourself with that monster Orochimaru!" Mizuki grew frustrated.

"I would rather ally with a monster than a demon!" Hiruzen had heard enough. He through Mizuki into a Genjutsu and got down to Naruto's height.

"Naruto, I need you to tell me everything that's gone on between you two.

"I failed my exam. I was told I wouldn't be allowed to advance with my classmates. Iruka-sensei tried everything he could to help me, but what was on the test was just... too much. Mizuki told me that if I stole the scroll of seals and learned something from it, I would be allowed to pass." Hiruzen grew serious.

"I learned a jutsu from it, the Multi-Shadow Clone Jutsu. I knew that my chakra could handle it, you yourself told me I had a lot of it. I learned it and Mizuki seemed... off. He told me he the other teachers wouldn't allow me to pass anyway. He said that you wanted to talk to me about it." Hiruzen grew enraged.

"He henged as you, and we've been meeting here. He tried to pry as much as he could from the scroll. If it wasn't for the fact he was forcing it, he would hold some of the most dangerous jutsu in Konoha. I've been trying to get your attention without blowing my cover. I'm not foolish enough to think that I can kill Chunin after all." Hiruzen nodded with a smile.

"I was afraid you wouldn't figure it out... I guess not-dattebayo!" Hiruzen chuckled.

"After realizing that I started stealing the pots, I thought that maybe one of your anbu might show up... I didn't expect you... thank you." Naruto said his thanks especially low, he was slightly embarrassed he couldn't deal with it on his own.

"After I got here I started stalling for time since I felt a strong person coming. I think Mizuki did too. After I knew you were here I gave him a fake scroll. I never took the real one." Naruto gave a classic Uzumaki smile. Those always make Hiruzen's day.

"We can be informal now that you've reported what you know." Naruto started to snicker. "That's good Ji-chan. I don't like being so formal with you." Hiruzen couldn't help but chuckle, it was nice hearing those words.

"Come on Naruto, I'll tell you more about everything formal tomorrow. For now, we'll go get something to eat, and you'll tell me all about your training." Hiruzen smiled in his grandfatherly fashion. Naruto could always tell that Hiruzen was like the whole village's grandpa, but more than his respect for Hiruzen for caring, one word rang through Naruto's head...

"RAMEN!!!!"