Danika

✢ THIRTY THREE ✢

Abaddon walked out of the bedroom and saw Estrella and Danika standing in the corridor waiting to come back in.

"Hey Danika, why don't you come with me for a little bit?"

"But I wanted to see daddy." Danika pouted. She looked over at Estrella who didn't understand what was happening.

"I know," Abaddon said then scooped her up into his arms. "But your parents need to discuss something, when they're done you can come to see daddy. But until then, let's go on an adventure."

At first Danika wasn't sold on the idea, but after some thought, she decided to give it a shot. She nodded her head.

Estrella watched them wander down the corridor before disappearing around a corner. She turned her head in the direction of Lucifer's bedroom; hesitated then headed inside. Lucifer continued to lounge in his bed, but this time a bit more onto his side.

"Come here." He ordered, tapping the empty space beside him. Estrella sighed then crawled onto the mattress, lying beside him on her back. His elbow supported his head, his fingers buried into his hair.

"Yes?"

"You're having a hard time," he paused. "That's my fault. I should've coached you through this."

"What are you talking about?" She asked.

"Darling, we feel everything more intensively than humans do. But sometimes, that can be too much to handle and we unintentionally become numb to deal with it easier. You did that."

"That doesn't make any sense, I didn't do anything."

Lucifer sighed.

"You think you didn't but you did and I'm not going to let you continue to do it. Something happened that was too much for you to handle. You deserve to feel everything, happiness for when our daughter is around. Living the rest of your new immortal life shouldn't be spent numb and miserable, Estrella."

He was right... she knew she felt numb and she knew why. She couldn't lie to herself nor to him, but she didn't want to be truthful either. Lucifer watched her closely, he could see the wheels beginning to turn and expressions begin to return.

"Tell me what happened." He mumbled.

She inhaled deeply.

"Everything changed when I woke up," she paused momentarily. "Like my feelings for you... I noticed that your feelings towards me changed too, but then I realized it was only because I wasn't human anymore. So, I got pissed."

"And just... went numb?"

"Yeah," She said softly, feeling ashamed. "But you only love me because I'm like you now."

"That's fucking bullshit," he snapped. "You know I've always loved you."

"Not the same way you do now!"

"Estrella, I'm not arguing with you about this. This is besides the point!"

"No it's not, this is what you wanted, right Lucifer?! Now that you're getting it, you don't want it anymore?" Estrella snapped, then sat up. Lucifer followed, groaning from sitting up too fast.

"What do you want, Estrella?" He asked genuinely. Estrella hesitated to answer for a while.

"Something that I know I can't have... you."

"Why can't you have that?"

"Because that's not who you are, Lucifer. You're you, you're not loyal to anyone except yourself."

Those words burned, but she was right. He knew that.

"Give me the chance then. If I fuck up, then promise me you won't give me another chance."

Estrella looked at him. Was he being serious right now? Even if he wasn't, she didn't really want to miss the opportunity.

"I promise."