Love Grows (Love series: book 3)

Chapter 31.

Ella

Today me and the babies are being released from the hospital. It's been a week since I woken up from my sort of coma. And in the last week I've re meet all the people from before the coma. Like Riggs, Willow, Oliver, George, Amanda, Max and believe me when I say that the moment Valerie walked into my hospital room, the machines were beeping like crazy.

Until everyone explained to me that Valerie was now apart of my family. That alone I needed to be convinced of because this is Valerie.. freaking she- devil Vaughan, but when I saw how Remi held her hand and seemed so comfortable with her was proof that she was in my life now.

When I saw everyone, they felt familiar to me. But I couldn't places them, or any memories that I have with them, it's frustrating because I wish I could remember anything at all, about the last two to three of my life.

But it's still fuzzy and I hate this hollow feeling inside of me. I hate that I can't remember marrying Scott, I hate not remembering Remi's as she got older. Or remembering the moment that I found out I was going to be a mom again,

And all that pregnancy experience again but this with Scott by my side.

It's still awful to feel like this, even though physically I'm in good health. I still feel broken in a way that I might never heal from.

Everyone is being prentice and helpful. They are giving me space and going at my pace, letting me lead with the questions and such but that was here when I was in hospital.

I'm going home today, to a house I don't remember with a loving husband I don't remember. And I'm scared, how is this supposed to work?

This is the house I share with with Scott apparently. To me in my mind I haven't live in the same space as Scott since I was nineteen years old.

Me walking into that house with him today will be normal for him, something we've probably done before, but I don't remember it.

How are we supposed to make this work without my memories and with three kids depending on us.

But on another note, this week hasn't all been a emotional roller coaster of depression. It's also been roller coaster of joy, because I saw Remi. I saw how grown up she is, I saw me and Scott in her. I saw how she and he have this bond that I thought they would never have.

And I met and held the twins, my little boy is the spitting image of his father. And my little girl she looks so much like her older sister when she was born.

When I saw the twins for the first time, when I held them. I wasn't expecting the rush of emotions to hit me, the love, joy, happiness, and a little bit of fear.

The fear is there because I'm scared apart of me will never remember, the moment when I first knew they were inside me, that I won't remember that first kick, the first time I heard the heartbeat.

I've experienced all of that this with Scott, I just can't remember it. And I want to so bad and the fear that I won't scares me.

"Hi, are you okay?" Snapping out of my thoughts and look up at the sound of the voice. Too see Scott standing there, a car seat in each hand.

Seeing him holding the babies and being so gentle sirs something inside of me.

"Yeah just overwhelmed but in a good way. Are they okay? Your sure their healthy enough to leave the hospital?" I ask him, as he places the car seats on the hospital bed as I stand to get a better look at them and smile.

"Yes Ella. They are perfect and, they are healthy" He says to me with a chuckle.

"I still can't believe they are ours...you know" I whispered, as I just stare at them.