Daryl's Lullaby ~ Daryl Dixon x Reader ~ On Temporary Hold

Ch. 44 ~ Another Funeral

A/n: First and foremost I want to apologise for my temporary leave of absence during the month of May. As some of you know I was busy finishing off my last handful of assignments for college. I can now inform you all that that's all finished with and that I will be back to some sorta regular updating schedule while I wait for results day.

Secondly I would like to thank all my loyal readers for the support you've shown me and for getting my book to 50k reads. I never could have imagined this book would do so well.

Anyway I won't bore you anymore as you know I hate making excuses and taking up too much of your reading time.

Little note for all: I tend to post on my conversations page on my profile when I won't be updating so for those who want to stay notified you should head over and give me a follow... if ya want.... totally optional.

Anyway enjoy the long awaited update.

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Y/n's POV

I'm no stranger to death... But death can sometimes be strange. I've never really had time to process a person's demise before always having to push on and continue with whatever task laid ahead. Sure after everything was done I'd have some time to think back to the moment I saw the light leave their eyes, but at that point my emotions were already nullified.

Dale's death was different, it was the first death where I had time to properly think and feel for. It might have only been 2 and a half weeks since I met the group but still in that short amount of time I've gotten close to them. I've learned to care for those who are still with us and joining the group along the way.

And for those we lost at the beginning, I hardly noticed how I felt, just chalking it up to another fallen soul in my dull state but now after Dale, my heart hurts for the first time since I was a trainee. Not even Sophia's death had such a toll on my mental and physical state, probably because she was already long gone when I planted that bullet in her cranium.

Either way it's nice to finally feel something again...

I turned my head up to the sky watching the clouds pass by in it slow motion. Sleep had seemed like a foreign friend that night so I spent my time outside the shed Randell was locked up in. I sat in front the door thinking, feeling and process my emotions.

I had long since stopped crying over the loss of my friend. My shock long passed yet the pain hovered like a weight on my shoulder. A nagging voice in the back of my head asking myself if there was something I could have done to prevent this? Maybe if I had tried harder to argue that Randell be let off then maybe he wouldn't have been out there. Or if I had gone to check on him instead of... of almost kissing Daryl.

No matter how hard I pondered whether Dale's death was preventable; my answer always eventually led to the same. Even if Dale survived that walker, it was still in the field, near our camp, if it wasn't Dale, it would have been another poor soul instead. While I hate to admit it it was probably better off this way.

Dale knew he wasn't gonna last long, admitted it even, and in some way it was better he be the one to pass then someone else from camp especially if it meant Carl, Beth and Jimmy got to live a little while longer. Their young lives lost would have been far more tragic to Dale's long one.

Besides it's better he passed now cause god only knows what the future has in store. Natural selection, evolution, with time who knows what these walkers will be capable of a few months down the line.

Night passed into day. The morning rays gracing my tired face and swollen eyes. Skylla stirred in my lap, having been laying across it offering me some warmth. The sound of chains rattling inside the shed indicated that the once quiet snores of the boy I could hear among the crickets of the night was now awake.