The following morning i woke up feeling exhausted. After crying over the fact it was clear i was ruining everyone's life around me. My mum loved my friends more then me. I don't mind that much everyone needs a mother to love them and my mum was the perfect one around to be a surrogate mother. What hurts me is the fact she looks at me like i am the one that's the problem. That im the one who brings her fear. Why would anyone want to be around that sort of person?
Exactly they dont want to be around the sort of person who bring fear to their life or can kill them just by loosing their temper. No one want to live around that sort of person. So i dont blame my mum for what she's done. I just wished it wasn't as obvious as a slap in the face.
Getting out of bed i checked my phone and saw no texts or missed calls. No one tried to contact me and that made it even more obvious I wasn't wanted. With a heavy sigh I headed to the bathroom to shower and get ready for my day. My long and lonely day.
Leaving my hotel room wearing a pair of jeans and a black button down shirt i was stopped in the foyer of the hotel by he manager. He handed me a letter before returning to work. Looking at the thick black card stock envelope that was black in colour with my name in gold calligraphy writing on the front. Turning it over i saw a shimmery white wax seal with rose in the middle of it.
Opening the black envelope i saw decorative paper on the inside that reminded me of a pearl. The shimmer on the card stock paper was elegant. Pulling out the card in the inside i read over it seeing it was an invitation. I was invited to attend a dinner to celebrate my new white rank. Other people in attendance would be the other five white ranks. I was being invited to meet them and so they could become familiar with me.
I was unsure about the invertation. One how did anyone know where I was i told no one where i was staying. Two these are white rank people. It could be a trap to try and kill me. But then again there wouldn't be a problem if that happened either. My desire to be alive each day gets less and less. One of these days i probably wont wake up and that will be okay.
I was startled when someone came up beside me taking my hand in theirs. Turning my attention to whoever took my hand i was surpised to see Olivia. She gave me a bight smile.
"What's the plan for today?" She asked me as she pulled me along to the exit. "You must have been pretty exhausted last night to not wake up and come get me from home." She spoke as we went outside
"Right." I answered her feeling guilty i had abandoned Olivia last night with no explanation. "How did you know where i was?" I asked her keeping my eyes on the ground as i walked with her
"You always stay at the same hotel in the same room. As much as you was to deny it love if you tried to disappear on me it wont take me long to find you because you are a person of habit. Eventually you will resort to old habits for comfort and ill find you then." Olivia explained to me. I didn't say anything. She knew what i attempted and still came to find me. Why?
I didn't say anything as I followed Olivia down the street with no direction to where we were going. I just semi followed Olivia unable to talk to her. I felt so guilty. I felt like i betrayed Olivia and all i did was not pick her up last night, I could have played it off like i overslept and forgot but i was there last night. She probably watched me leave honestly.
"Are you not going to talk to me today?" Olivia asked braking the silence between us as we walked into a park.
"What do I even say love?" I asked her keeping my eyes on the ground as we followed a walking path.
"Maybe you could remind me how much you love me?" Olivia asked with a playful and cheerful tone.
I stopped walking and my sudden stop jolted Olivia to a stop. She turned to look at me and smile despite my expression. I knew how sad i looked but she still smiled at me.
"I can't live without you love." I told her as i looked up at her. Her expression faltered now as she looked at me. I saw how upset she was and i hated i caused her this pain.
"So why did you leave me behind?" She asked me i felt defeated and i dropped my head as the words left my mouth before i could hesitate.
"I didn't expect to be alive this morning."
