The Unnamed Feeling (Steddie)

Hand of Doom Has A Tight Grip On Me

Dustin left Eddie alone long enough to go to the payphone by the gym and call Steve. He was just about to leave for work and was annoyed that Dustin was bugging him when he should be in class, but when he told him why he was calling, Steve promised he'd be there as soon as possible. He just needed to call in to work and let them know he wasn't coming in. When Dustin got back to the van, Eddie was still crouching in the back corner, still rocking, curled into a ball and muttering under his breath. Dustin tried to sit next to him, but Eddie had yelled at him, something about him being too close, so Dustin Just sat in the driver's seat and kept an eye on him until Steve arrived.

When Steve got there, he tapped on the window and Dustin pointed towards the back of the van. Steve opened the back doors and sat down next to Eddie, saying his name quietly. Eddie raised his head and looked at Steve with round, terrified eyes. After a moment, he grabbed Steve around the neck and curled himself against him. Steve put his arms around Eddie and held him tight against his chest.

"I'm here, Eddie," he said quietly. "I've got you. You're okay."

"I lost them," Eddie said. "They're gone. I lost them. I don't know where they are."

"What did you lose," Steve asked. Eddie didn't answer, he just clutched Steve, scooted closer. Steve slid further into the van and closed the door behind him then pulled Eddie onto his lap. "What did you lose, Eddie," he said against Eddie's hair as he kissed the top of his head. "Talk to me. Tell me what's going on."

"My meds," Eddie finally said. "I put them in my pocket at home." Steve felt around in Eddie's pockets but found nothing. "They're gone. What am I going to do?"

"Can you smoke a joint? Will that help?" Eddie made a movement that Steve assumed was a shrug. "Where's your stuff?" He did it again.

"Here," Dustin said as he pulled the lunchbox from under the seat where he'd stashed it.

"Dustin," Steve said, startled. He'd completely forgotten about him. "Give me that and go to class."

"No," Dustin answered defiantly. "I'm staying here until I know Eddie's okay." He opened the lunch box and dug around until he found a joint and handed it to Steve. "What's happening?"

"He's having an anxiety attack." Dustin's eyes went wide as Steve put the joint between his lips then dug into Eddie's pockets again until he found a lighter. He lit the joint then pushed Eddie's hair out of his face and held the joint to his lips. Eddie closed his hand over Steve's and took a hit. "Look around for a pill bottle," Steve told Dustin. Dustin pushed the lunchbox closer and motioned to the few pill bottles inside. "No. Prescription pills. With Eddie's name on them." Dustin nodded and started searching the van. "Take another hit, baby," Steve whispered to Eddie. Eddie took the joint from Steve and smoked it while Steve stroked his hair and back. "We'll find them for you."

"Clonazepam?" Dustin asked slowly. Steve looked over and Dustin was holding a brown prescription bottle out to him. "It was wedged in the space between the floor and the side door."

"Thanks." Steve took the pills from him and opened the bottle. "We found them," he said to Eddie.

Eddie sat up some and held a shaking hand out to Steve. Steve put a pill in his hand and Eddie looked up at him, pleading with his eyes. Steve laid a second pill in his palm and Eddie popped them into his mouth and swallowed them dry then laid his head back against Steve's chest.

"Is he going to be okay," Dustin asked, concern clouding his face.

"He will be soon." Eddie took a couple more hits from the joint then handed it back to Steve. "You done?" Eddie just nodded so Steve handed the joint to Dustin. Dustin looked at it and grinned. "Don't even think about it, kid. Just get rid of it."