Floss // A Harry Styles AU

twenty-seven

Shit. It was all shit. Everything was shit. Shitty-shitty-shit-shit. Life is shit. Mostly. My daughter was sick and it was shit, her baby-daddy had reappeared and it was the shittest timing. I found out from the Town Bike (that's not a euphemism for a woman sleeping her way through all the men in the village, there is literally a man that rides through Bibury on a motorbike with a sidecar offering lifts like a taxi service) that Owen showed up at Geri's house on Monday evening screaming bloody murder and she had to be rescued by Zara and Mickey. I was waiting for the proverbial ball to drop. Something else was pending, a doom I couldn't see emerging out of the mist yet.

It had been five days since Federico showed up on my front door, and I still hadn't told Harry. I didn't know how to. Every time I saw him it was either by accident in passing, or he took me straight to bed as soon as I walked in the door and fucked all sense and thought out of me. I could never find the right time. But I was determined to tell him today. I couldn't keep this from him forever - he had a right to know.

I was waiting for Dad to finish a car so I could lock up the garage and go. My usual Friday night ritual was unchanged, summer holidays be damned. Ruby had been a little grumpy this morning when I took her to Mum and Dad's, but seemed to perk up at the idea of spending the day with her abuela to learn Spanish. They were going to the airfield at Kemble for the day to see an airshow. To make it better, Barb and Nigel were taking Oscar, so she'd have some company. I made sure the rucksack I gave my mother had plenty of backup pads and painkillers. She was due any day now and I didn't want the poor thing in a state like that in public.

Just as Dad finished the car off, I got a text on my phone from Federico. The daily dose I never asked for.

Rico 17:40
¿Puedo verla mañana? ¿Por favor? x Can I see her tomorrow? Please? x

I dragged a hand down my face. Shitty-shitty-shit-shit.

Rico 17:40
I have a viewing with your friend for a flat in the afternoon. Maybe you will come with me? x

Fuck sake. I wanted to say no, but I was struggling to find a reason to. We'd have Mickey there as a kind of mediator. That made it better, right? That would be okay? I could just say to Ruby we were helping my friend find a flat and he wanted our opinion. She'd probably love it, too. She never had any problem giving over her opinion.

"¿Qué pasa?" Dad asked, apparently noticing my tortured expression.

I sighed. "Rico quiere que veamos un piso con él mañana." Rico wants us to view a flat with him tomorrow.

"Ah." My dad gave a slow nod. "Do you want to?"

"No." I said without missing a beat. "But I also don't want to keep telling him no. He's text me every day asking to see her, Dad."

"At least he wants to know her, Floss. Him not trying wasn't his fault - it was his silly mother's."

"I know, I know." I whined, walking to the car with him. "Does this mean you think I should take her?"

He pursed his lips. "I'm not sure. I can understand your reluctance, but the man deserves to know his daughter. If I was in the same position with you I probably wouldn't be doing anything different."

Bollocks. Bloody shitting bollocks.

I knew what my dad was trying to tell me. I gave him a hug and a kiss on the cheek and then sat in the car, typing out a text.

Floss 17:45
Te aviso por la mañana. I'll let you know in the morning.

I drove home with a stormy face, desperate for a shower. I knew that if I timed it poorly Harry would absolutely get in with me and I'd forget about the very painful but important conversation I needed to have with him.