❥𝑹𝒆𝒅 𝑳𝒐𝒗𝒆

Chapter 10

Narrator POV

»You and Charles Leclerc? Nooo wayy!«
Valerie and Juliette were sitting in a bar, getting one drink after the other.
Valerie took a sip. »It was like 4 years ago. And it wasn't even that much of a thing though..«
She and her new friend were meeting in the evening after the race at a local bar. Even though Juliette was really good company, Valerie could only think about what happened earlier.
They kissed. Twice!
It's a disaster, she thought to herself

But in that moment, she felt free and without any worries. She saw the man she once loved in a situation where she had to help him.
He never had panic attacks or something similar in the past. None that she knew of.
But Valerie just had the urge to be there for him.
And it worked. He calmed down and found himself.
But at what cost? That kiss - both of them- was just so... unproblematic. They just did what their feelings told them.
But it wasn't right. She knew that. And she hoped he knew that too. They can't just go back to the time before everything around them burnt down.

In the meantime Juliette ordered herself another drink.
»I bet he's good in bed.«, she suspected dreamily and took a big sip.
Valerie almost spit her drink out and coughed. She didn't expect Juliette to say that and the surprise and embarrassment were all over her face.
»What? He's not?«, Juliette asked with an offended, surprised tone as she saw her friend's reaction.
Valerie just looked down on her drink, avoiding to answer.
»Oh my god..« Juliette pointed at Valerie with a finger. »You two never-?«
Valerie rolled her eyes. »Of course we kissed and stuff but...«
»But what?«
She hesitated to answer. »I wasn't ready for that step back then«, she began, »And Charles respected it. He never did anything I didn't want.«
Juliette's eyes got bigger. It seemed like she almost had to sob.
»He waited for you..« She whispered, but loud enough for Valerie to hear it. »That's so cute!«
Valerie smiled at her friends words.
»He was indeed a gentlemen.«, she mentioned and looked back to her drink, looking for something at the bottom of the glass she wouldn't find.
»You still love him.«, Juliette said.
Valerie scoffed. »Nah. Our time is definitely over.«
»Sweatheart, that was not a guess. It was a statement.«, Juliette took another sip.
Valerie looked at her friend.
»I see the way your eyes glow when you're talking about him.«, Juliette added.
Valerie ordered a new drink.
»Let's talk about you. How's your love-life?«
Valerie changed the subject quickly.
Juliette knew what she was doing. She was denying her feelings, like she always does.
But she understood that she didn't want to talk about it anymore.
»Well, I'm single. What can I say?«
»Should I give you my brother's number?, Valerie suggested chuckling and took a sip.
»You definitely should.«

Charles POV

I was walking on the sidewalk, on the phone with my brother Arthur.
»Oui, Oui. J'arriverai à Monaco demain. Es-tu chez maman?» [Yeah. Yeah, I'm coming to Monaco tomorrow. Are you with mom?]
»Ah, Je sais. Alors je te verrai un autre jour. prends bien soin de toi !« [Ah, I understand. I will see you on another day, then. Take care.]

I just hung up the phone, when I walked past a bar. Two women were walking out. They said goodbye and one of them walked off in another direction.
»Valerie?«, I whispered to myself while observing the woman that was still standing outside.
I came closer. »Valerie? What are you doing here?«
She faced me with dizzy eyes.
»Oh, hey Charlie. How are youuu?«
»Are you drunk?«
»Noo, why would you think that?« Valerie could barley keep herself on her own legs and she was definitely not in any condition to make it back.
»I guess I have to get you back to the hotel then.«, I finally said. »Do I have your permission to carry you?«, I asked more sarcastically than serious since she wasn't in the condition to answer it the way she wants.
Valerie nodded.
»Alright.« I lifted her up gently and carried her along since the hotel was only two streets away and getting a taxi seemed unnecessary.
»We are looking so dumb right now.«, I mentioned, not really expecting an answer.
»Seems like this is becoming our thing, don't you think Charlie?«, she said underneath her breath.
»What?«
»You, bringing me back to this stupid hotel.«
I scoffed and just carried on.
I looked over the fact that she called me "Charlie". It was my personal nickname she gave me 4 years ago and she always used it to tease me. But hearing it again after that much time has passed by, it kind of gave me a warm, comfortable feeling and the urge to laugh.

While walking, I looked down on her. Her hair was half in her face. She wore a jeans and over her T-shirt was a short, beige jacket that was fluffy from the inside.
Todays afternoon came back to me while I was staring at her being half asleep in my arms.
I never had a panic attack or anything else. But in this moment I was so disappointed and angry about myself and it got ahold on me. I couldn't control it anymore.
Then Valerie came in. And she knew what to do. I didn't expect it to be a kiss but I can't say I didn't like it.
After all I started the second one. It just felt right in that moment. But she was right to break it off. We should've never done that.

I laid her down in her bed in her hotel room. I looked at her and decided I can't let her sleep in that clothes. »Where's your pyjama?«, I asked, not sure if she would reply.
»Bathroom.«, Valerie just said and stretched her arms.
»Here.«, I reached out her light-blue pyjama. Noting came from here side, her eyes were closed.
»Do I really need to do this?«, I said, more to myself than to her. I sighed.

I undressed her, making sure I wouldn't see too much and put her pyjama on. At least she helped me a little bit with taking her arms or her legs up to make it easier for me.
I shook my head in not believing this is just happening.

»I told Juliette allllll our dirty little secrets, you know.«, Valerie giggled and reached out a hand.
»Yeah. If only there were ones.«, I replied jokingly and walked over to the bathroom to put her other clothes there.
While walking back, her bedside table came in my sight. Tablets in a blister where laying there.
I grabbed a blister and took a closer look.

»Do you need to take those?!«, I asked seriously, hoping she would notice my question.
»It might be better if I do.«, she murmured and took her blanket to put it on top of her.
»For Gods sake.« I took the glass of water that was also standing on the table, I squeezed a tablet out of the blister and reached it to her.
As she recognized me coming closer, she sat up and took what I was giving her.
»For what even is that?«, I continued to ask.
But she just gave me the glass and turned to her side, with her face in the other direction, showing me her back.
I gave up the asking, grabbed my jacket I put off earlier when I entered and headed to the door.

»Stay. Please.«
I turned around and saw Valerie laying with her face in my direction again.
I hesitated. She was drunk. She didn't know what she was saying.
»Good night.«, I answered and left the hotel room.

Tomorrow would be my flight to Monaco. I would get to see my family again. And at the end of the week there's the GP in my home country.