Missing You

First Night Together

There was a moment of silence. Jine seemed to be somewhere else but not anymore in that place as she was feeling surprised, glad, beautiful, confused, and in love all at the same second. There was also a very sad part of her buried so deeply that she would not let anybody to sense a bit.

"Jine," Calvin's voice broke the silence and brought Jine back to where they were presently standing as he gave her a gentle, seemingly lasting pat on the shoulder making her remove her hand from the doorknob.

"Ah, oo. Sige, pasok ka," Jine was already stuttering. She forgot what would be a right reply to him.

With Jine's invite that he come in, Calvin obliviously removed his hand on her shoulder making his hand fall slowly, unintentionally feeling her arm's flesh in a split second, down to slightly touching the back of her palm with his three fingers farthest to his thumb.

Ano ba 'tong nangyayari sa akin? Jine thought as she felt his touch. She closed her eyes as if dearly feeling his touch but immediately opened them and slightly shook her head to bring herself back to reality. She composed herself. She was the kind of person who could overly compose herself whenever she liked. She already mastered how to be stoic as if feeling nothing. That personality looked really cool on her.

"Upo ka," she wanted him to sit comfortably on her couch. It was obvious with her tone that she returned to her so called coolness. "What can I offer you? Something to eat or drink or both?" she said while getting two glasses from one of the cabinets.

"Jine, can we go," he paused for a while to check if she was looking at him but she was not though she was listening, "sa kwarto mo?"

Now those last three words of him made her look at him forgetting the glasses she was holding, so they slipped off her hands and caused her a wound when she was gathering the broken pieces.

"May first aid kit ka ba?" Calvin asked when he immediately went to her and saw and held her bleeding finger.

"Ako na. Kayo ko na. Maliit na sugat lang naman ito." She went to her room to get the first aid kit leaving him, but conviced that he would follow her into her room.

"I'm sorry you got a cut." He was already in her room. He sat on the edge of her bed where she was also seated. He sat across her, took the kit from her, and applied first aid to the cut.

That was a slow motion for her while he was treating her with first aid. She was looking at him with her expressionless face so that anytime he would look at her, he would not sense how she really dearly felt just looking at him. The moment was so precious to her that she would not welcome any thought of how this man in front of her became her ex-boyfriend.

"Dapat kase nag-iingat ka," he said with a worried tone when he finished putting the band aid on her wound. He suddenly changed his tone as if he realized he was sounding worried, "Hai, ang lambot ng bed mo. Ang sarap sigurong matulog dito." Before she knew, he was already lying on her bed facing the ceiling. Maintaining her coolness, she did not mind him. Instead, she turned her view to the window beside her bed, near where Calvin was lying. That window signalled that the sun began its setting.

She did not know what happened next, what they talked about, or what they did. She just remembered what she wanted to remember. She remembered how he pulled her and made her lie on the bed as how he did. They were lying side by side each other when he said, "Ang daming bituin sa langit... Basta 'pag hindi mo 'ko kasama, isipin mo lang na isa ako sa mga stars na 'yan, wanting to give you light," he said looking out the window.

"Tatandaan ko," she replied after some seconds which seemed a forever then closed her eyes convinced that he would just watch her in her sleep.

Points for Analysis/Reflection

 

1.      Why do you think Calvin still went to Jine when it was conveyed in the story that their relationship was already over?

2.      What do you think do the last lines of Calvin imply?