blood,drugs and suicide. (frerard)

deep thinking and severe depression.

"Oh baby!" I pleaded
"What???" Frank freaked.
"Mom ditched me..." I was very upset now and couldn't keep my anger in. What happened if I hurt someone. It isn't like me but I really considered self harming. "Franky?" I sobbed to him. "Yes sweetie?" He looked worried now. I explained how my mom reacted to my talk with her. He felt sorry for me.

"Come inside babe's." My boyfriend whispered. I walked in the door way and wiped my feet. I then taken off my shoes and ignored frank, the basement was all I wanted to think about right now.
He looked confused.
"Gee?" He called down the stairs. "Yes baby?" I asked.
"What the fuck you doing?" He had puzzled look on his face, I put an end to his confusion and simply said "I want to start this god damn band so that's what we're gonna do!" I cried.
He looked happy for a moment then I think he realise that starting a band required more effort than we all expected. He replied to me "um I'm sorry babe's but it will be hard to do that, all of us kinda dropped out without telling you because we didn't want to crush your dreams cause you see, we haven't got the money for all the equipment...sorry gee." He looked ashamed of himself for speaking to his love like that but he looked like he really wanted to tell me. Poor guy.
I hung my head low and carried on stepping down into the darkness. It was colder than usual down in the basement. Way colder... I glanced at the shimmering cobwebs in my view and the prickly blackness of the night outside of the windows. I was interuppted from my dreaming by a little spider crawling across my shoulders. Luckily I haven't got a phobia. I jumped at the sound of foot steps passing down the stairs. It was probably frank but I just wanted to be alone, I finished 'I'm not okay' so I thought it would be a good time to make a few other tunes. How was I supposed to do this when I was being stalked by my own boyfriend? Doesn't he realize what peace means?
I sat at the dusty,mold ridden desk with a lamp to guide my thoughts. Maybe I should just leave for good? Do I really want to put up with this? Everyone has let me down! Even my best friends....I'm feeling depressed again. Would a new start help me?
All of these horrific thoughts entered my head and never left.
I thought to myself, I said I wanted to make a band and what do they do? They say no. I come out to my family and they just disown me. I haven't got any friends at school so...I. ..I may as well leave, suicide or just running away, either way. It's better for me...
After at least an hour of being alone, Frank must of got the message by now that I wanted to just be alone for a bit. I decided I would leave for good. It would do me better.