Fragmented

Turning a Filipino House Party Into a Drinking Game

1. Sit yourself down on the white plastic chair and wait for your aunties and uncles to ask you how your day went. Stand back up, and quickly walk upstairs to your room. Take a swig of one of the Heinekens you hide underneath your bed.

2. Remember that you're 19 turning 20 this year. Take a sip every time you repeat I don't feel like I'm 20 in your head.

3. Go back downstairs and stand outside of the front door for a few minutes before you go back outside in the garage to greet everyone else. You love your family, but they drain you completely. Once you're outside, ask your aunty—the one who owns the house—if you can drink a green bottle with your uncles. It is crucial that you pretend as if you do not have an almost-empty Heineken in your room. Take a sip once she agrees.

4. Take a sip every time you see several of your aunties stare at you in disapproval.

5. Take a sip every time one of your uncles ask you, "Wow, you shoot green bottles?"

6. Take a drink every time you look at your mom.

7. Take a drink for every time she frowns at you.

8. Ponder about the reasoning behind her frowning. Do not look her in the eyes unless you want to cry. This part of the game is fun and riveting, don't you think? Test your emotional capacity through this step. See how far you can delve into your memories without crying. 

As you delve deeper into your memory palace, envision your younger self seated at the dinner table with your parents. Through the foggy image in your mind, really hone in on your dad's half-empty, third glass of wine that is placed on the left side of his plate. Now really reminisce on his behavior to your mom after his drinking sessions. 

Take a swig for every time you think about your dad. I mean, everyone says you look like him, why don't you start acting like him then, right?

9. Your aunties want you to set up the karaoke machine for the millionth time. You know your singing skills are definitely nonexistent or barely there, but your family loves it when they hear your voice. The first time you sang a song in front of them was during your high school graduation party. Remember how you exited the bathroom to hear a popular Filipino song you knew playing in the background. Remember how you asked one of your uncles to play that same exact song on the karaoke machine. Remember their applause and cheers that night. Wipe the forming tears from your eyes, and pray that they don't see you tearing up. Blame it on the alcohol. Take another sip.

10. They ask you to sing "Buwan", "Bakit Pa", and "Pusong Bato". Take a drink for some liquid courage.

11. After finishing singing all three songs, hand the microphone and remote to your aunty who then queues "Hopelessly Devoted to You". Finish the rest of your bottle. Go ahead, you've earned it...just don't look at your mom when you place the bottle down back on the table.

12. Crack open another one despite your mom's disapproving pleas and interjections. Cheers with your uncles and take a swig.

13. Take a sip. Place your bottle down again on the table and stand up, since you need a break from drinking for a bit. At the very rate, the music seems too loud and the incessant chismis and chatter from your aunties are causing your head to lightly pound and throb. Make your way over to the table where all of the Filipino desserts and dishes are meticulously placed next to each other. Grab yourself some banana lumpia and puto. Actually, grab more banana lumpia—not because you like it so much yourself, but to give some to your mom once you get back to your seat...kind of similar to a "peace offering".

14. Once you've finished your food, take a drink to wash the banana lumpia and puto down.

15. Glance at your phone, it is 7:55 pm which means the party will end soon. Your family owns a market business which opens at 6 am everyday, so they obviously need their sleep. Think about the long hours your parents work everyday of their lives and think to yourself, is this why they're always so cranky when they come home? Take a long swig for when you remember you help out at the market on Saturdays for minimum wage now.

16. One of your uncles is singing love songs on the karaoke machine. Sit there, green bottle in your left hand and your right hand is placed on the table, tapping to the beat of "Bed of Roses" by Bon Jovi. Try not to think about what happened. Try not to think about him. Secretly, you cheers to him inside of your head. He is now one of the reasons you drink. He is now one of the reasons you live to forget. Take a drink, you need it.

17. Everyone is cleaning up now, and you do your best to help out by folding the white chairs back and stacking them on top of each other. Try your best to clean up the dirty paper plates and the numerous pieces of scattered trash on the ground. You're a little drunk now, but that's okay. Take a swig.

18. Your mom is calling out to you, a signifier for every time she and your dad are about to leave to go home. Your mom does not drink, but your dad does, and you haven't stayed in the apartment ever since COVID-19 happened. Take a sip for every time you worry about what happens after every family party. Take another sip for worrying about what happens to your mom once your parents arrive at home.

19. Hug and kiss your parents goodbye. You can sense your mom's disappointment through the thick tension in the atmosphere, but she says "I love you," and you have to say it back. "Love you too." You don't include the 'I' though. Is it because you're drunk or did you do that on purpose? This part of the game allows you to make your own choice for this rule. Finish your drink once they drive off.

20. Do your best to walk upstairs to your room. Stare at the Heineken bottle that you almost finished at the start of the night, and wonder whether or not you want to take the last few sips of it so it is finally empty as doing so will probably cause you to slightly trigger your vertigo. Do it anyway. Take three sips from the bottle, and lift the bottle even more once you realize it is empty, desperate for the bitter taste.

21. Lie in bed and recount all of the events that happened tonight. If you can remember anything at all then you lost, and if you can't remember anything that happened tonight, well then you "won". If you won, you completed your mission—your goal—you drank to forget, but know that tomorrow when the sun rises, you will probably remember. I'm sorry if you do end up remembering.

22. Go to sleep.

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Another creative writing assignment I had to do! We were assigned to create a piece based off on a Hawaiian author's piece that turned a Hawaiian funeral into a drinking game.