my online lover

rescue

Kevin's pov.

I've never been a nervous person. In my whole life, I have always handled every type of situation being calm and firmly. I know that panicking doesn't help. All you can do is find a solution to the situation; if you can't, you try to accept the consequences of it.

That's what my whole life was planned on. Being strong enough to act with no nervousness, regrets and softness. And I could do that if I only hadn't a good mother who taught me how to be a good man. A weak one. I can act with no nervousness and thoroughly, but my heart will always feel the heaviness of my actions and my feelings will never shut down. I just can't. I have this way to feel deeply when I am into something.

I feel the responsibilities of my action pushing on my back. This was for all the bad things I've done.

From my first kill to Enede.

Meeting her is something I will never regret, but the pain of falling for her will always haunt me. I shouldn't have done that. I should've left her as soon as I knew the situation was not the way I planned to because now she is risking her life just because she has been seen with me. We're nothing. We have never been something, even if I am aware we both have feelings for each other.

She gave me a very good plan, to expose my father and I just told her no. Why? Because what my father has always taught me was that family comes first. And it had so much impact on my head that now I am on a thin string and I am trying not to fall.

Should I do it? Should I just expose my father so I could live my life? There is also the percentage of me getting in jail, because of all the illegal things I did... that I did for him. I was always forced but I don't think judges will take that as a way to not make me guilty.

I huff pushing my head back on the sofa, closing my eyes and trying to stop my mind to run so fast. That's why I never wanted to be in a relationship but have only distractions and right now I am overthinking about the fact that it's late morning, and she hasn't replied to me since yesterday night.

I know she hasn't left the house for days and that she doesn't need to text me whatever she does, but it just feels weird. I have this bad feeling in my chest that is trying to tell me something happened and if she doesn't text me back, it's because of that.

I decide to stand up and leave the house to see if I can reach her somehow. I don't care if she is at home and will be mad about me being there. I need to be sure she is safe and to know why she hasn't been answering my texts. She is still under my responsibility, and I need to protect her, to keep her safe.

I'd never been a nervous person until I met Enede.

I leave my house and reach for the Audi, jumping in with no hesitation. As the car roars in my ear, I push the throttle and leave the street as fast as I can and while I drive to reach the centre city, I also try to give her some calls but she is not answering me and this is another push to make me feel something bad happened. She doesn't decide to ditch me one night for the morning. Something must crop up.

I drive to the parallel streets against the Duomo to not find the traffic of a Saturday morning and as I reach the street where she lives, I slow down to not make too much noise. I know she hates when the whole road can hear me coming, so I try to sneak in with no sound. I turn off the engine and I head out of the car.

There is no one along the way, so I walk to find myself right ahead of her building's door.

I take a deep breath and then press my finder on the doorbell but no answer as retort. I can still hear the dog barking and this is not a good sign. She would never leave the dog alone, not even for five minutes. If she has gone to Antonio, she would've brought him with her.