Running with Wolves 3

15

⚠️ MAJOR CONTENT WARNING ⚠️
(Tears are possible also)

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Alex's POV
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It's 3am.

I sit anxiously in the waiting room, my stained clothes still dripping wet. My hands are shaking, I think my whole body is shaking but that could be because I'm cold. Am I cold?

My eyes are staring at the tiled floors, hands tugging at the roots of my hair. Am I rocking or is the world swaying? I don't know anymore.

Fuck!

I can't get it out of my head. I don't want to close my eyes because I see it again and again and again. I never want to see that again. Never again.

It's been a few weeks and things for Blue just haven't been getting better. She stopped eating entirely, hiding her food and refusing to eat anything with me even in the room.

She stopped talking. Not just to me but to everyone. Our appointments with Natalie were done in silence on her end, only nodding her head when it hurts and even then it wasn't every time.

She refused to do any kind of physical therapy, remaining either in bed or in the bathroom. I wish I'd have seen this sooner but I didn't.

I was too busy being an Alpha to be her mate. I'm her mate first before anything else. I'd give up my title in a heartbeat for her, it means nothing to me. She is my absolute everything and that's never going to change.

I wish I'd been around more. Maybe then I'd have seen that she was falling further and further into her depression. It doesn't take a genius to see how broken she was.

The signs were all there, I was just too stupid to see it. I should have fucking seen it.

She spoke to me the other day. She got me to sit with her. She ate with me in bed. She laughed. She smiled. She made me think she was doing okay. She told me she loves me. She—

I hide my face in my palms, feeling the tears as they streak down my cheeks. This is all my fault. I'm a terrible person. I can barely sense my wolf, his consciousness completely repressed to the point where I don't think I'll ever see him again. Not after tonight.

I came home late last night since I decided to stay at the Pack House to finish organising some files. I shouldn't have stayed late. If I came home on time this would never have happened.

The house was eerily silent when I got home, I should have known something was up straight away. She's my mate, I should have sensed something was wrong.

It wasn't until I saw the water on the landing that I knew something was wrong.

I burst into our room moments later, finding the bathroom door locked. She never locked it. Even when she was mad at me she didn't lock it because she'd occasionally call out for me to help her when she fell or couldn't get herself in the bath.

My shoulder is still dislocated from the amount of times I hit the door in my frantic state of panic. I couldn't even comprehend how to get to her. I just needed to get to her. Nothing made sense to me in that moment.

She was on the floor. She was covered in blood. There was so much blood. Why didn't I scent it? Why couldn't I have gotten home early? Why did I stay late? She needed me and I wasn't there! I should have been there!

"They need to set your shoulder, sweetheart," Grandma speaks up from beside me and I weakly nod, feeling hands on my arm moments later.

They start saying stuff to me but I ignore them, waiting for my shoulder to be popped back in. I'd have done it myself but the pain has been a good distraction for me since I got here.