I'll Walk Through Fire And Ice| Chanlix Royal au

Time Together

Chan was walking through the halls trying to find Hyunjin. It was time he made things right with him, and Minho. They both deserved explanations but Hyunjin more so.

Chan wanted his best friend back. After his parents deaths, while Minho had to go deal with some stuff, it was Hyunjin who there, who held him while he watched his parents being carried away. It was Hyunjin who stayed with him all night and hugged him to sleep. It was Hyunjin who stayed with Chan for months while he mourned but controlled the kingdom at the same time. It was Hyunjin who took his side when the kingdom believed Chan killed his parents. It was Hyunjin who stood by Chan's side at his coronation, when the crown was put on his 15, almost 16 year old head. It was Hyunjin who helped him make decisions, it was Hyunjin who protected him from himself.

It was all Hyunjin.

And it was Hyunjin who he pushed away. That was the biggest thing he regretted in his reign as king. He had to make things right.

Chan could still remember the dreaded conversation he had with Hyunjin that separated them for years. Chan was 17, 2 years after the murder, and Chan was not in his right state of mind since it was their death anniversary.

Flashback
"Hey Chan, what's up?" Hyunjin said as he was coming out of his room.

"Nothing Hyunjin. But here's the thing. I'm a murderer. A cold blooded fucking murderer and you know. No one can know Hyunjin so I swear to all that is evil, if so much as a word comes from you, I will kill you and everyone you've ever loved. And trust me, you know I'm more than capable."

Chan said in a deadly tone that had Hyunjin almost in tears. Chan's eyes were black and filled with darkness, Hyunjin was terrified at this point and all he could do was nod. He knew Chan was capable.

After then, Hyunjin would avoid Chan just like the older would avoid him, and as years passed and Hyunjin became head of security, they kept a strictly professional relationship and Chan had no idea how to fix it.
End of flashback

Chan was not in the right state of mind at the time. It wasn't just the death anniversary of his parents but his brother, who he killed. That thought was something Chan hated more than life itself and it sparked something in him. Something that made him make sure no one ever said a word about his brother and the incident. And it was the same day Chan got rid of every book and anything else that could possibly disclose that he had a brother.

He obviously forgot one book, the one Felix found.

And every time he thought about the terrified look on Hyunjin's face, he would hate himself a thousandfold more. Hyunjin didn't deserve that, not after everything he did for Chan, so he owed Hyunjin a huge explanation.

Chan was in a dark place at the time. Even if it had been two years, the guilt of him slashing a sword across his own brothers throat was eating him up. It was the same guilt he felt for years following that. It was the guilt that made him mad, it was the guilt that made him build walls.

He fucking despised himself. Even if he tried to kill himself, he always stopped because then his parents' deaths would have gone in vein. He would have killed his brother for no reason, and that was worse. So he lived. His body lived but his soul was already six feet under. Until Felix came along, that is.

He soon found Hyunjin in the library with Jeongin. Jeongin was holding a book and was seated in hyunjins lap, his legs over his thighs and an arm around hyunjins neck while the blond played with Jeongin's rings as he read.

It was a sight that Chan rarely ever saw and he'd hate himself even more if he disturbed them, so he left. He'd speak to him later when he was alone, right now he wanted to spend time with his lover, the blue haired advisor was busy most of the time and now he had time. He would let him spend it with Hyunjin.