Existence

Chapter 25 "With you"

A woman's voice answered, "May I know who is this? And What do you need?"

I replied, "I'm one of Christian's closest friends, I just wanna know where is he right now because he's not answering my calls and messages-"

"Nova? Nova, this is his mother. I badly wanted to tell you now but we should see each other face to face. You will see me outside Saint Michael Archangel church"

She hung up and I immediately got to the church because of so worried

When I arrived at the church, I saw Christian's mom waiting for me while covered in black clothes

When I looked inside the church, they were running a funeral

I asked Christian's mom, "Wh- What is going on?..."

"We should go to my house now so we can talk about it..."

When we arrived at their house, she grabbed my hand and said, "I'll show you something from Christian's room"

While we were walking upstairs, I was so confused but worried

"What happened? Can you just tell me already?" I asked

When we got to Christian's room, his room was so messy and there was a rope hanging from the ceiling while the chair is opposite the rope. The chair has a lot of blood on it

As I looked at the chair, I suddenly trembled and tears suddenly came out of my eyes

I shouted, "Wh- what is going on?! Wh- who did this- Christian will never do this! He's- He never thinks of any of this! He will never kill himself...!"

I cried more as I lost the balance of both of my knees as I keep trembling

His Mom tries to stop me but she started crying too

She sobbed, "I'm sorry...! I failed- to be his Mother"

She then stood up, grabbed the paper on the table and handed it to me, and sobbed, "He wrote it for you"

The paper has a letter on it written "Nova, sorry for you to encounter the bruises that I got from my Father's abuses. He was mad at me that I didn't take exams from my college. Now, I failed so many classes, I got kicked out of college.  Sorry that I lied about my bruises and sorry I lied too about the day's exam. I failed, and now I have nowhere to go. I'm sorry. But I'm already tired of everything. I love you so please continue living and live your life to the fullest."

"Why you didn't do something?! Why you'll just let him die?!" I shouted

She sobbed, "We tried to run him to the hospital but he didn't- made it!... I'm sorry..."

The other day, I kept crying as I stare at Christian's letter, I can't sleep because of thinking of him

You said you would never leave...

I'm tired of everything

I have nothing left

Live my life? How can I live without you? 

My life... Has been so enjoyable and happy when I'm with you

Without  you, I wouldn't experience love, fun, hugging, laughing, smiling

I would've died if I didn't meet you

Now, you're dead, I wanted to die too

The people I've been with, Ian, Mary, Tristan, Ava, my parents, my grandmother

I feel so bad for all of you who didn't see my worth

I'd rather die than to stay with people like you

"The knife that's in my back will leave your heart to roam"

"As pleasure turns to pain, I'll be alone"

I'll die with you, Christian

~𝒯𝒽𝑒 𝑒𝓃𝒹~