NEVER LOSE YOU AGAIN

CHAPTER 9

'oh.' she said as she picked up the pillow from the sofa and kept it in her lap. 'why are there so many twists and turns always in a genuine love story? i mean, i just want to ask destiny that why so much pain in a genuine love?' she sighed

'varun, do you really want to go to new york?' she asked

'yes.' he said

'but why do you want to go all of a sudden?' she asked

'because there is quality life, and i don't wanna miss the opportunity to earn in triple to the amount i am earning right now!' he said

'think, aarushi won't be there, aunty won't be there. no one from your friends. all strangers. are you sure?' she asked

he gave her a nod. 'aarushi,' she turned to me 'have you searched for anything else than medical?'

'yes. there are options in the research field, but they're too basic for me, i guess.' i said

'are you sure you don't wanna go? because many people regularly fly off from india to somewhere else just for the quality of life.' she said

'nidhi, i can't just simply go like this. i need to plan. and, i never wanted to go to any other country. i want to work in india, and that's final.' i said

'tell us. what should we do?' varun asked.

'this is quite complicated.' she said 'let me think. but again, think, are you both sure?'

we nodded. 'do long distance na!' she said

'nidhi, the problem is still there. just imagine, i get married to her, i go there, she gets a job here. then what? we video call each other the whole life? nidhi we need to get settled now, we're 27. do you really think, that we have a great future with long distance?' he asked.

she was silent for sometime, and she was analyzing every aspect.

'shall i be honest?' nidhi asked 'that might hurt.'

'yes. it's okay.' i said.

'varun, go to new york.' she said 'aarushi, stay here.'

'what stupid shit, nidhi? i won't be able to come back ever, i'll lose her.' he said

'okay then, dial your boss's number right now, and tell him that sorry sir, i can't go to new york because i want to stay with my girlfriend and she can't come. sorry. go, tell him!' she yelled

he went silent.

'look,' she continued 'i know, you have a very long relationship, and a strong one. but ask yourself, can you take it forward at the cost of your careers?' she was stating facts . 'because to me, this is the only way out. you both want to stay at different places, rather different countries, and are not even ready for long distance! i mean, you're closing all doors, and then you are expecting a way out!'

'varun, let's say you don't go to new york and work here, then you'll get aarushi, your mom, you will get married, have kids, but ten years down the line, you shouldn't complain that aarushi compelled you to stay here. the decision is yours.' she asked

'and you, aarushi, let's say you go to new york with varun and start some business or a job, will you be able to live a regretless life to see your degree turn into a sheet of paper and no use? you bloody worked your ass off for that, right? still, leave that. let's say you go there and you start a business, and god forbid, it doesn't go well. or maybe you're not happy with your job. then whom will you put the blame to when things start getting bad? varun, right? and then, back to the square one! fights, and all! does this sound convincing?' she asked

we both were silent. she somehow sounded convincing

'guys, think. whatever you choose, regret is going to follow you. but, if you ask me, career seems a little important to me. you both are so young, your careers have just taken off, you can't sacrifice your dreams at such young age! some decisions have to be taken by mind, not by heart. these are just feelings....you'll learn to let them go....' she said

'just like your feelings wiped off for ansh?' varun asked and i felt he shouldn't have mentioned it.

'yeah, in a similar way...i loved him, but i knew he can never be mine.. i was never the kind of girl he would choose out of so many! so i had to let him go. and if i can, then you too can!' she said.

i was tired of this. god can't be so cruel, i thought.

'so what do we do? end it?' varun asked

'who said that?' she asked

'means?' i was confused.

'you don't have to permanently end it.' she said

'nidhi, i think you've got some major brain problems. i think you can't process what you say.' varun said

'varun, my brain is totally fine. and listen to me carefully.

both of you, end things for now, because that's what you guys want, right? you can't do long distance. no calls, no messages, nothing. varun, if you take my advice and leave for new york, go there, and try to focus on work and meeting new people. same for you aarushi, meet people, hang out and live a normal life. and observe yourself, do you get the same feeling with anyone, or is it just in your brain that is playing games. i know, it will be tough for a few initial months, but you don't have to talk or contact each other. let your brain think, let it suffer, once it faces it, the solution will come out on it's own. till we're not in the problem, we can't think properly about the solution. and who knows, you might find a middle way! or you might have some realizations.. and maybe, you can find someone new too! everything is possible.' she said.

her point was valid, but the route was...tough.

'see, if you're meant to be together, there's no power that can separate you. but if not, maybe...' she paused and we understood her sentence. 'but you should not sacrifice your careers. that's what i think, the decision is yours.'

seeing the horror look on our faces, she said 'just thik, you don't necessarily have to do it.'

varun looked at me, and i looked at him. i still couldn't process, are we for real? are we facing it really or am i just in some nightmare?

my phone rang, interrupting my thoughts. i went to pick it and i paused as i read the name on the screen.

'NISHA MAAM AIIMS'