Angel In Disguise

Chapter 31 - A Broken Heart

"Amado."

He freezes at my voice and then hesitates before turning around to look at me.

"What do you want?" He is trying so hard to not look at me. I feel so guilty when I notice a bit of red around his eyes.

"I'm sorry."

His eyes instantly meet mine and I'm so sure that he hates me now.

"You're sorry?" He doesn't believe me. "Sorry for what exactly?"

"You lied to me so many times. You made me fall in love with you like a fucking fool all while you were in a relationship." He clenches his jaw looking away for a brief second.

"You made me believe that there could have actually been something between us." The way he is staring at me makes me feel even worse than I already am feeling and making myself feel.

"Amado, I can't explain myself but I'm sorry." My voice comes out weak and my eyes begin to tear up.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you." I try my hardest to express how bad I do feel.

"I promise you that there are answers to everything, but I just can't say them." I try to get close and take his hands in mine, but he doesn't let it happen. He moves away from me and looks at me like I'm deadly poison. I completely understand but it still stings.

"Don't touch me because it will only feel painful." His eyes are swelled up and he just looks so enraged with me. He is never going to forgive me for this.

"All I've done was love you and protect you, Katya and this is how you pay me back..." He is looking deeply into my eyes, and it is only making this more painful than it already is. "You pay me back by breaking my heart into pieces."

My tears fall.

"I promise that I didn't mean to." I tell him in desperation. I'm fighting the urge to touch him so that he can feel that I am telling the truth.

He sighs deeply running a hand across his face in frustration and anger. "You don't know how painful it is to simply look at you."

"Me rompistes el puto corazon y el alma en pedazos, Katya." He says lowly, wiping his eyes aggressively.

I don't speak Spanish, but I can quite understand it. I'm sure he just told me that I have broken him.

"It's really not what you-"

"Don't speak anymore. I can't take any more of your fucking lies." He looks at me once more.

I really can't stand the way he is looking at me, but I deserve it. I really do deserve his rejection and hatred. I never once deserved him in any way, and I should have stayed away from the beginning.

"I didn't do it with bad intentions." I quietly speak, my voice coming out so weak and shaky that it is almost embarrassing.

He bitterly chuckles. "You're a liar. That's what you are and it's all you'll ever be."

His words are like punches right in the face. My hurt feels like it's slowly and painfully losing blood. He's not wrong. I've lied to him and everyone so much. I have hidden so much as well, and I really do deserve to feel this pain for the way I unintentionally played with him and led him on.

I'm about to speak when a woman suddenly appears standing beside him and staring at me. She has bright red lips and a blonde bob, and she is wearing very short black silk robe. Her hair is a little messy and I only think the worst.

She makes me feel shittier when she takes Amado by the arm tightly and in an almost possessive way. I look over at Amado who isn't doing anything about it.

My chest begins to feel heavy when I realize that he has already replaced me. It stings and badly, but I guess I deserve it.

I only take one more and last look at him before deciding that it is time to leave. There isn't anything else for me to say or do here. I turn my back on them, and I walk with tears leaving my eyes carelessly as I deeply feel every ounce of pain in my body but specifically in my heart.

I watch her leave until she has disappeared.

I shake the woman off of me and she immediately stands in front of me with a face of concern. She tries to grab my face but I also back away from her. Katya was the only one that could touch me and now she isn't allowed to anymore.

"Do you want me to comfort you?" That's the worst thing she could say to me right now.

"Please, fuck off and leave me alone. I'm really not in the mood to deal with you and your bullshit." I reply but don't give her the chance to say anything or even leave because I just walk back into my apartment.

I was going to go visit my mama and aunt, but I don't feel like it anymore.

I've never felt so hurt and heartbroken in my life. I never knew that my sweet looking angel would do something so painful like this to me.

It hurt badly when I saw with my own eyes that she was standing beside that fucker. She confirmed with her own words that she was with him. It pissed me off badly to the point that I destroyed my whole apartment when I got home after she refused to talk and asked me to leave.

It feels like she has cut right through my hurt with a knife, and she has stabbed it deeper just now.

I just let her think the worse from me when seeing the woman who hasn't been after me in quite a while. I saw the sadness and hurt in her eyes. I was waiting for my body to feel satisfaction from it, but I couldn't help but feel even worse to see her hurt.

It physically pained every inch of my body to watch her walk away crying. I badly wanted to go after her and express how much I love her and that she is the only one for me, but she obviously doesn't feel the same toward me.

It's so stupid that I feel so much love for her still. I just can't help it.

I feel like I'm dying inside at just the simple thought of her. This is hurting me so badly and all I want to do is cry. It's all I have been doing. I want to cry for her, and I want to cry out all the stupid love that I have for her. I have become hers in every way and she threw me out of her life like fucking trash. As if I were nothing.

I don't understand why she would do such a cruel thing to me. I'm trying to understand her so that I don't have to feel this way, but I really can't.

I need her badly. It's something I never would have thought would happen, but it is true. I need her but she doesn't want or need me.

She made her decision and only she knows why she made it and why she did the things that she did.

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