Paper cuts & Paper rings | JayWon

17. I wish I could be with you forever

When they finally reached the hotel, Jungwon quickly unlocked the door and fell right onto his mattress with a relieved sigh. He smiled, too comfortable to move yet to cold fidget. His eyes trail back to Jay, and they settle gently on him leaving just enough space in case Jay wanted to lie breathlessly as well.

However, Jay instead walks over to the windows which still don't have their curtains drawn.

"You enjoy today?" Jungwon smiles as he rolls onto his side.

Jay doesn't respond but instead lightly chuckles. He turns to Jungwon and purses his lips. "The days are not over though," he sighs and rests his cheek on his fisted hand with an airy smile that almost confuses Jungwon. "If you're still up for one more thing?"

"What do you mean?" Jungwon pushes himself up on the bed and faces Jay as he bites back his grin. "Did Jane and Sunoo let you in on this secret vacation or what?"

"No, no it's not that," He quickly shakes his head as if he's almost embarrassed and Jungwon can't bite back his smile any longer.

"Then what is it?" Jay takes in a deep breath, approaches the bed and takes a seat on the edge.

"I guess I feel guilty for ruining your day today," and before Jay can continue Jungwon reaches out for his hand. For a slow second, they let their fingers intertwine with each other and it's strange to feel their worlds colliding again. "So please, just let me make it up to you whether you agree or not. Please?"

Jungwon squeezes his hand tighter and draws himself a little closer to Jay before nodding. "But next time, don't beg so much – I prefer the airy mysterious Jay," he teases and rests his forehead against Jay's.

"I'll make a note of that, darling," Jay lifts Jungwon's hand and presses a quick kiss on his knuckle, "or do you prefer Won?" now it's his turn to tease and Jungwon doesn't hold back on tickling him either.

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"Where are we going?" Jungwon asked when they left the hotel. He felt so stupid for not asking the most obvious questions while they were still inside. However, when he looks over at Jay it becomes obvious to him.

He glances over at him, pressing his index finger up to his own lip instead of answering Jungwon's question. "We have to be quick okay?"

"Are you sure about this?" Jungwon furrows his brows and Jay suddenly stops to squeeze his hand. He grins and shakes his head.

"I was only kidding about the quick part, Won," He chuckles and Jungwon shoves his shoulder gently at his childish stunts, "you worry too much," he whispers over his lips and only then does Jungwon realise how intimate this all is. He swallows hard, the night too dark to make his flushed cheeks evident to Jay.

As they walk, the lights illuminate the gardens and parks surrounding the area and it reminds Jungwon of his backyard and how they would sneak out every night just to get some time alone. He suddenly feels an awkward pit in his stomach at the thought of going home almost as if he were going to leave everyone behind.

The blanket of stars draws his attention to Jay stringing him along but his hand, his hold on his fingers gentle but tight as if he were afraid to let go. He smiles and begins wondering what it would be like to live a life like this every day – being able to kiss Jay openly, and go out in the middle of the night without being scared out of his mind that he might get himself or Jay in trouble, have a family with him, be surrounded with people that support and believe in his sexuality, but most importantly have an assurance that Jay and he could be together.