The wild side// Y/n x Nikki sixx

Please don't stop loving me

"Morning... Vince" 

"Morning Y/n" He groans rolling over to face me

"Are they still asleep?" I nod over at Tommy and Heather

"Yea" 

"Ok..."

"You gonna tell me why your in here?" He frowns 

"Nikki refused to let me in the room, Heather was so helpful, I really owe her one... she talked to him apparently he's gonna talk to us today? I don't know... she just... she really helped me" 

"Well that's good... sorry I didn't help I just really didn't wake up I guess"

"Yea I know... it's ok we got it sorted I just... I just wish that Nikki would go to rehab or summit because it's getting to much for me to handle, he's hurting me and himself... I'm just scared because every time he does that he's a step closer to it being his last and I just can't loose him to death I just can't"

"I know... I know don't worry he's ok" He calms me

"I know... but for how long" I frown

"I don't know... maybe you both should go to rehab?"

"You think? I don't know if I'm ready... maybe we should wait till after we finish making the Theatre of pain album"

"Ok..." He sighs

"I'm gonna get up" I slowly get out of bed and walk out of the bedroom heading straight to the bathroom

~

I walk out and head into the kitchen to make some coffee, I pour two mugs then walk over to mine and Nikki's room, I take a deep breath before slowly opening the door

He is fast asleep at the bottom of his bed, so peaceful, so beautiful, so calm..

"Nikki... Nikki wake up, I made you a coffee"

"Huh" He grunts trying to open his eyes "Oh thank you" A small smile grows on his face

"Do you remember last night?" I sit down on the edge of the bed, my coffee in my hands taking small sips

"Yea... we hung out with Heather then... went to bed" He mutters knowing himself that isn't what happened but he's scared of what I'm gonna tell him

"No... we argued" I groan "you keep telling me 'Your acting like this is my fault', so obviously I got mad because you said other thing before that, that really fucking hurt... so I said 'It is, because your the one letting heroin ruin our relationship...' so you got mad and pushed me out of the room... I had to sleep in with Vince because you wouldn't let me in..."

He just looks at the floor unable to answer

"I just want you to stop it..."

"I know... I wish I could because it is so fucking draining and the fact I'm hurting you... I'm sorry..."

"But your not gonna stop it though... your just gonna go on and take some tonight"

He just ignores me because he doesn't want to admit to me that that's true

"I just can't deal with it anymore... it's making me so drained I just can't cope Nikki.."

"Well what are you saying?" his eyebrows furrow

"I don't know I just I can't... I can't keep looking after you"

"Do you want to move out..? what... what are you looking!"

"I don't fucking know Nikki maybe just a damn break!"

"A break from what! Me?... the band?... our relationship..."