𝓘 𝓼𝓮𝓮 𝔂𝓸𝓾 -Lσ'αƙ-/OC

𝟙𝟜- Screw up (Lo'ak POV)

Chapter 14
Screw Up
Lo'ak POV

She left.

Of course she left I screwed things up, again. I had planned this amazing night in a field surrounded by glowing fireflies and an incredible star gazing spot and surrounding that area was a small river that hugged the area all the way around, inside lived an array of fishes swimming around freely. It was perfect and I lost that the minute I started overthinking.

*flashback*

I gently grabbed Räya's hand resting it on top of my waist, the warmth of her hand spread through my body like wildfire.I heard her gasp gently "Sorry, were about to descend and I didn't want you falling" I partly lied, of course I don't want her to fall but I also wanna be as close to her as possible even if that is just having her hand on my waist. When I am with her my world becomes so much more clearer, and I don't feel so stupid I actually feel like I belong somewhere.

My ikran lands gently on the ground. I jump off turning to Räya offering her my hand as support, and to also be a gentleman to the best of my abilities. "I can do it" she says confidently but just when she is ready to jump off my hands found their way around her waist and I hoisted her down myself. "I know you can" I smiled at her.

"So forest boy what are we doing here, exactly?" she asked her voiced laced with curiosity. I am so excited to show her what I found. "Let me show you" I offer my hand to her once again, this time she gently places her hand in mine giving me a static like feeling on my palm. I turn away from her and start leading us both towards our destination with a huge smile on my face.

That didn't last long.

I caught a glimpse of a plant that looked all to familiar.I slow my pace down to get a better look. It was the same plant that Tuk was playing with that time when she convinced me to let her tag along with me and the others, the time when yet again I almost got them all killed.

I felt my mood turn sour, and suddenly I'm back in that moment with the avatar holding a knife to mine and my family's necks.I couldn't protect them. I put them in danger.I could have killed them.

I was brought out of the horrific trance by Räya's voice "what's on forest boys mind?".I tried to lock up my emotions and ignore the memories. I hummed before turning slightly to face her and responding with "nothing, I'm just enjoying the time that we have together".
Which was true but the reality is seeping in, I can't protect Räya, she has gotten injured due to my idiotic actions before I can't bare the thought of putting her through that again. I took a deep breath.
"And I guess as well I'm also enjoying being free from any criticism you know?, I'm constantly being compared with my brother he's the mighty warrior and I'm just the screw up" I slowed down my pace even more my words feeling sour on my tongue, Räya shouldn't have to put up with this."Lo'ak you're not a screw up I think-" I interrupt her, she doesn't know anything about all the bad things I have, and could have caused at home I'm a walking time bomb and clearly anyone and anything near me ends up suffering due to my behaviour, I'm trying to save her. "No you don't know that, back home I almost got my brother killed and all because I was trying to show everyone that I can do it, that I can be a good warrior instead all I am is a disappointment". I stop walking the date at this point left my mind I wanted to stop what could evolve from this relationship, my feelings are getting too strong and although were both still so young I'm beginning to understand what others call love. I turned around and looked in her eyes our hands still clasped together making my words to come much harder to say, the look in her eyes is so pure I take in each of her features, the strands of hair that somehow always get un-braided, her freckles that are so imperfectly perfect and just her as a whole.

I feel my emotions getting harder to conceal, and what I did next I will regret for the rest of my life.

"Räya I want to take you back home, tomorrow" I said this words with sadness reaping from my heart.

She immediately lets go of my hand and staggers a few steps backwards. Her once peaceful expression is now covered in an expression I can only describe as hurt but also anger, I see tears well up in her eyes and my chest physically aches seeing her in this state.She broke eye contact with me, her eyes now fixed on the floor.

"Wha what do you mean why would, why would you do that I mean just a minute ago you were saying how you are enjoying the time we have together alone!" I notice that she clenches her fist and her voice is firm but also cracking. I continue to look at her like if I look away she is gonna leave me forever. Which at this point is inevitable. She looks back up at me.
"You know what Lo'ak I wanted nothing more than to spend more time with you experiencing your world. Do you remember that time I was going to tell you something before you asked me on a date?"

I nod.

"Well I was going to say I was thinking about going home, but I didn't because you looked so happy about asking me on this date, great date so far by the way loving it" just as she finished her sentence her tears cascaded down her cheek. I felt numb at this point but doing this can stop anything else bad happening to her on my behalf. "Räya please, I'm just trying to get you back to our people it's dangerous out here an-"
"our people?, our people?! Lo'ak you will never be one of our people!" Räya looks away and turns around walking away leaving me frozen in spot with no one.

*End flashback*

I'm currently sat in the centre of the tree that me and Räya have made so many memories in, I can still hear her laugh repeating throughout the forest.

I curl up in a fetus like position letting my emotions run loose. I was there for I'm not sure how long before I finally realised that I should follow after her. Sitting here is not gonna change anything and I can't stay here alone. Not because i'm not strong enough or anything I just wanna make sure she arrived home ok.

In reality it did not take that long at all to finally see Räya's home come into perspective, somehow though it felt like eternity as if I was stuck going in a loop round and round no end.

When I was close enough to actually make sense of the tiny figures walking around in the night I spotted Räya being held in her sister's arms as they walk into their pod. My heart was still aching.

Will it ever stop?

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Word Count: 1,256

That was it for this chapter, will Lo'ak and Räya make amends find out in the following chapters to come!

As always leave a vote on this chapter so I know how you enjoyed it or you can leave a comment telling me what you think see you in the next chapter which is going to be....

Healing