the next day, i promised myself that i'd clean up.
and so, little by little, i tried getting myself out of my bed.
i felt so weak with every move i made. i didn't think that i was weak physically, but because i was so drained mentally, it caused me to feel exhausted as a whole.
i carefully removed my comforter off my body as i crawled out of bed. i walked around my room and then caught a glimpse of myself in the wall mirror.
i paused and slowly stepped back, turning to look at myself. when i scanned my body from head to toe, i couldn't help but cry.
i was unrecognizable. this wasn't the hisano that brought him happiness.
quickly, i went to the bathroom and washed up. my parents weren't home so i assumed it wasn't late.
i got the shower started, and before i stepped in, i had remembered that memory of jungwon and i.
we took turns to shower, and he cut my hair.
my hair used to be barely above my shoulders, and now, it would reach my elbows in a just a few more months.
i took a deep breath before stepping in. this was going to be a long warm shower.
once i finished, i threw a towel on myself. i then walked out and went to the living room.
my father must've forgot to put his mug in the sink like he always does, so i did it for him and walked around the kitchen.
i saw the calendar hanging on our wall. school was going to go back in session in two days after break.
time flies fast, i thought.
i saw my uniform laying on the couch. it was ready to be worn.
it was just another uniform. but, why was i so sad?
maybe because i knew, that if i were to spill tteok-bokki on it again, i wouldn't see him at the laundromat this time.
i cried.
i missed him so much.
i had missed everything so much.
♡
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