i'd like to look at him more. i wanna brush my finger against the line of his brows. my favourite feature of his, alongside his eyes. gosh... those eyes.
in the moments when i wake up earlier, i get to watch his sleeping state. his breathing is steady and slow, never failing to calm me down. i reach my index finger to gently—and so carefully run it through his long straight eyelashes.
laundry boy, who smells like clean clothes fresh out of the dryer. laundry boy, who smelled of baby powder in the morning.
laundry boy, with perfect hair, broad shoulders, and a beating heart.
i'd like to be with you, spending each second knowing you love me.
if i could go back, i'd save you once more.
look at me, jungwon.
do you feel my hand against your heart?
i love you.
✧
he held my hand throughout the whole tiring process. it was successful, and once i held my precious child against my chest, all i could hear was weeping.
tears rolled down my face, but i was so happy. i looked over at jungwon who had one hand covering his eyes to hide his stream of tears.
when it was his turn to hold him, jungwon's nose pressed against rah-ben's small shoulder. i knew from then on that i wasn't going to be sure when i'd get him back. jungwon had already stole him from me.
i smiled at the sight, and soon enough... i was smiling at the memory as i watched my little one run away from his father, with laughter coming out of both their mouths nonstop.
i watched them and thought of how funny it was that jungwon had taken my place. back then, it was me running after him all the time.
how does it feel, laundry boy?
the chase will take your breath away, but it's worth every bit of oxygen the moment you catch them.
and that's just what he did, lifting my rah-ben up into the air before spinning around and holding him tightly in his arms.
with jungwon... i wanted him. it wasn't just the curiosity that caused me to run after him every time, but it was the fact that i was aware of what i wanted.
and i knew i had to find a way to get it.
but little did i know, that you had already given your heart to me before i began chasing you.
i looked down at my hand that rested on my lap. i stared at the ring on my finger for a long moment before bringing it up to my lips. i kissed it with my eyes closed. the words 'i love you' running recklessly through my mind.
✧
"bora! your mom's here!" aeri yelled with her head angled at the staircase where he'd soon be running down from, along with aimee.
aeri had gotten a child around the same time as me, making our children the same age. with her high standards, she met a foreigner who courted her all throughout college when she had finally given up on finding a man to date.
"stop pulling onto me!" bora took aimee's hand, yanking it away from his clothes. a pout formed on her face as she began to tear up.
i looked at him, getting ready to scold him. "rah-ben." i said calmly.
he looked at 5 year old aimee, guilt forming on his face. he sighed and placed his small hands on her cheeks to stop her from crying. "sorry, don't cry."
