Dear Nick

Dec 9th 2022 4:01pm

Dear Nick,

Today was rough, in not going to lie. I feel so emotional. I don't like it, but at least I'm not frustrated anymore. Iris noticed me when I was setting against a wall during class. They asked if I was okay and I lied. Then they asked why I wasn't running around. I just shrugged. They patted my head. MaKayla even asked if I was okay. I just noded. I don't want to go back to my house. It isn't a home. I hate it there. Hahaha, I'm on the bus and I'm trying not to cry. One tear escaped, but I'm fighting them. I didn't eat today. I still need to loose that weight for you. I know I should just except the fact that you don't like me like I like you, but it's to painful to put down. Deep down in my heart, I think there is still hope, even though it is impossible. I think of you when I'm sad. I think of all the happy memories we made, the ones I'll always remember. The ones you probably already forgot. I still remember the day I first saw you. I was a 6th grader and you were an 8th grader. I thought you were so cool with your big trombone. You where showing your mom something was wrong with it. You smiled at me, which made my day. I always saw you, but you never saw me. Then at an after school practice, I have the contra bass clarinet, so I sat with the low brass. I had to sit in a jazz stool cause I was to small for the instrument. You hit me in the head with your trombone slide and said "Sorry, didn't see ya." It was so funny. We had so many great memories. I wish things weren't the way that they are. I wish I was born the man I'm ment to be. I wish you could love me, like I love you. I know it's a lot, and I know I'm being stupid, but I can't help it. I love you Nick.

-Sam