My Three Cousins

Chapter Twenty-Seven

The car ride was tense, and we were all angry.  The gloom of the rain on the windshield only seemed to make us moodier.  I leaned my head against the window and tried to doze off, hoping that I would wake up to find this had all been a bad dream.

"Shit," Mom said from the front seat, "we'll need gas soon."

I didn't even bother lifting my head from the window.  She could force me to leave my cousins and go back to her new life with Hal, but she couldn't force me to forgive her for what she had just done.  I tried to make myself believe Ruth's words as we drove away.  They were keeping themselves safe without me before I knew, they'd be able to keep themselves safe without me now.  No matter how many times I told myself this, there was a part of me that was worried I had abandoned my cousins when they needed me most.  This same part of me kept seeing the fear on their faces every time I closed my eyes.

The only thing that reassured me for most of the ride was that we had now been waiting with the defenses down for days and the electric man hadn't yet made an appearance.  I tried to tell myself that this probably meant he had given up and that my cousins wouldn't be attacked again.  Even the most optimistic part of me didn't believe this lie, but I kept repeating it as we drove along.

Eventually the movement of the car and the rain began to lull me to sleep.  As my eyelids grew heavy and I let my head rest on the glass on the window I started to feel like there was something I had forgotten.  It was only when I was woken from my sleep by a strike of lightning that I sat bolt upright and remembered Helen telling us about when the man attacked Aunt Maggie.

"He traveled in a bolt of lightning."

"What?"  Mom asked from the front seat, and I realized I had spoken out loud.

It was all too coincidental, the defenses go down, we get in a fight and abandon them, then during the fight both Helen and Joan leave the guard post, and now there is a lightning storm.  At this thought my feelings went beyond being me upset at my mom and hoping she would turn around to needing out of the car.  It felt like my chest was getting tighter and my vision was going dark.  The only thing I could focus on was getting out.  "Mom turn around," I could feel Fitz and Vivian's eyes on me and the panic in my voice even scared me.

"We've already had this conversation, Addison," Mom's voice was detached as if my panic didn't affect her at all.

"No Mom now, he's attacking them now."  

"Addison be quiet."  Mom tried to make eye contact with me in the mirror, but I was too frantic to hold her gaze.

"I'm serious Mom turn around he's there.  Please."  I was begging now.

"I am picking you kids.  I would pick your safety and wellbeing over anyone else in the world." 

"Do I seem well to you right now?  They are being killed as we speak.  You are turning your back and ignoring their murder."  I knew my words were dramatic, but I had to say anything I could to get through to her.

At this Vivian began to cry, "who's dying?"  She was sobbing even though no one answered her question.

"No one, Vivi," Mom said far calmer than she should have been given the situation.

"Really Addison?"  Mom asked.

I knew there was nothing I could say or do to get this car to turn back around.  Fitz pulled his ear bud out of his ear and looked at me with an expression of annoyance, "can you just go back to sleep and stop bothering us?"

I couldn't believe he had turned on me, but I laid my head against the window in defeat.  In my head I chanted please let them be ok, please let them be ok, over and over again.  Vivian cried herself to sleep in her car seat and Fitz went back to playing his video game.  

After fifteen minutes mom pulled the car into a gas station.  "I need to smoke, watch your sister," mom said as she got out and walked around to the other side of the building away from the gas pumps to an awning.  Mom hadn't smoked in years, so I knew this was stressing her out and I wished once again for it to stress her out enough to turn around and actually help her nieces.

Once she was out of sight Fitz slipped his ear buds out again and turned to me.  "Is there someone you can call for a ride?"

"A ride?"  

"Yes, back to help them," he was steps ahead of me.

I immediately thought of Lennox, "yes." 

"Ok get out and go before Mom comes back."  He was on the lookout for her as he spoke.

"She's going to notice that I'm not in the car," I pointed out, wanting desperately for his plan to work.

"I'll put a blanket over my duffle bag and buy you some time," Fitz seemed like he was getting antsy for me to get out of the car.  "When she looks back here, she mostly sees Vivian's car seat."

"Are you sure?"  I said, already moving to climb out of the car.

"If you're going to go you have to go now," he replied, doing his best to seem uninterested in whether I chose to go or to stay.

"Thank you, Fitz," I said, and I slipped out of the car.

Before I closed the door he stopped me, "call and let me know when everything is over and you're safe."

"I will."  I promised and I started to walk away.

"and Addison, seriously stay safe.  If you die, mom will kill me."

I laughed even though it seemed like me dying was a real possibility, "got it."

I went into the convenience store and pretended to be shopping while mom finished smoking.  She then went to the pump and pumped gas for what felt like hours before finally climbing into the car and driving away.  Even though I trusted Fitz's lying skills, I knew I didn't have much time so as soon as the car was out of my sight, I picked up my phone and called Lennox.

"Hi Lennox?"  I asked.

"Yeah?"  They already sounded worried.

"Can you come get me?"  

"Where are you?"  They asked with no hesitation.

"At a gas station on 88."

"The red or the blue one?"  I could hear them grabbing things and preparing to leave as they spoke.

"Red."

"I'll be there in 15."