Firehouse Oasis 118

25. Bobby

"Is Chris asleep" he asked as Eddie walked out of the bunk room, collapsing on the couch with an exhausted sigh.

"Yeah, Hen fell asleep with Denny too. I guess she was tired after we all lost sleep last night." Eddie answered sounding guilty, rubbing his eyes like he was fighting off sleep too.

"Hey, you don't have to feel bad about that. It isn't your fault and it isn't Chris's either. We all have bad days." He tried to assure the boy.

"I know, it's just, he lost his sister, you know. He's scared for her and he misses her, and I'm not her, but I'm the closest thing to it." Eddie tried to explain, sounding frustrated.

Bobby was immediately paying full attention, he'd heard Eddie mention Shannon a total of twice since he'd joined the group.

"I'm not her, and I'm not trying to replace her, but I'm still the one in charge of taking care of him." Eddie continued, "and it's like every time he misses her or wakes up from a nightmare asking for her it feels like I'm failing him and there's nothing I can do."

"You aren't failing him." Bobby assures him immediately, it was obvious how good a job Eddie was doing with Chris to anyone who had eyes, "and you're already doing what you're supposed to do. You're here for him, that's what he needs and you do it. You aren't failing just because he misses his sister."

"I just wish I could fix it." Eddie sighed.

"You know, you're allowed to miss her too." Bobby said, pushing his luck a bit, but it wasn't often that Eddie opened up.

"I Don't." The boy replied immediately, voice hard.

That was definitely not the response he'd been expecting, but he tried again, "Eddie, it's perfectly alright if you miss her, she was someone close to you. Staying strong for Christopher doesn't mean you aren't allowed to be upset yourself."

"No, it isn't that." Eddie shook his head, then glanced at Bobby like he was considering him. "Can I tell you something?"

"Of course." Bobby answered, nodding in agreement.

"You can't tell anyone." Eddie informs him, "especially not Chris, it would absolutely destroy him."

Was Shannon dead? Had Eddie known and just not been able to tell Chris? Was that what this was about? That still didn't explain why Eddie seemed almost angry at the girl, but then again, people had strange reactions to grief.

"I swear I won't tell anyone." Bobby promised.

"We didn't lose Shannon that night at Caledonia." Eddie said, looking vaguely sick, "She left us. Intentionally."

"What?" Bobby breathed out, shocked at the sudden turn of events, "Are you sure?"

"Yeah, I'm sure." Eddie nodded, clenching his jaw in anger. "After the fence came down everyone scattered and ran into the woods. I had managed to grab Chris and we were running through the woods looking for her. We came up on a clearing and I saw her at the other end of it. She looked right at me Bobby, eye contact and everything, started shaking her head and then she took off running in the opposite direction. I tried but I couldn't catch up to her. Chris didn't see it because I told him to keep his eyes closed until I said he could open them."

"I don't get it." Bobby said, because that didn't match the version of Shannon that Chris had talked about.

"Neither do I." Eddie huffed, "You know she was such a good big sister. They were in foster care before I.A.A.N. so she'd been taking care of him for his whole life pretty much, and she loved him. She loved him so much, I know she did. Except then she just left."