The boy I wanna kiss- Rinney

thank you honey

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A/N: I do not have a plan for how this chapter is gonna go. But it's gonna be rinney in the beginning and then some Blake family things later but be patient with me, the rinney content is coming💋

still thinking about writing another Rinney story so lmk if I shoulddd🙏

TW: mentions of death, pedophilia

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*Finney's POV*

I wouldn't say that I think about death more than the people around me. But sometimes, I think I might do.
The concept of death is scarier than it should be. Everyone knows that one day, you'll drop dead on the ground because it's how the life cycle goes. The scary part is, you never know when or how. The thought of getting murdered on the street crosses peoples mind from time to time but also the thought of having a heart attack. It doesn't matter if your 10 or 63, the chance of dying is always 50/50.
Now, that might seem depressing and a horrible thing to think about but when your name is Finney Blake, and your mother killed herself on a random Tuesday, you expect the worse.
Do I sometimes think about killing myself? I'll have to admit that I do. But it's not like I'd actually do it.

"Your thoughts are loud" I snapped out of my thoughts and looked at Robin who laid next to me.
"What?"

"I said, your thoughts are so loud I can hear them from here. What's up?" Robin tapped my forehead. I smiled slightly and pushed his hand away,
"Just stuff" I looked at him and he just hummed,
"Penny for your thoughts?"

"Sorry, the register is broken"

"Oh well. Is it about me?"

"You're literally laying right there. I don't need to think about you when you're here"

"Oh but you dooo because you're always on my mind so it would be weird if I weren't always on yours" he stated and I just scoffed at him,
"Can I pull the 'it's the day after my moms death anniversary' card?"

"Dead mom doesn't save you on this one" he chuckled and so did I.
Today has been one of those days where me and Robin has just done nothing. One of those days where we just enjoy each other's presence. We don't have to watch a movie or go to the arcade, just chill. It's nice, I like this. I know Robin loves running around, hunting for excitement while I'll more of a.. we'll just laying in bed next to each other. Of course me and Robin do fun things that he likes from time to time but I think he also needs to relax every now and then. But I think that's something he isn't alone with, everyone needs to just chill sometimes.

"Do you ever think about your dad?" I asked carefully, not wanting to upset him in any way.
"God yes. All the time" he said, looking at me.
"Really? What do you think about?"

"Well you know, how life was when he was still here. How he used to chase me with the hose or tried to learn me how to read properly." Robin smiled,
"The good memories." I nodded.
"Do you ever think about your mom?"

"Can't go a day. She's my mom after all, you know"

"Yeah totally." We both agreed.
I sighed before speaking,
"I just wish my mom didn't have to die so horribly"

"Right? They told us that my dad was blown up and bled to death." I looked at Robin in shock,
"Gosh, really? That's horrible"
Robin sighed,
"Yeah but, he died a hero" I nodded in agreement and we laid there for a few minutes,
"I hate that I'm still waiting for her to come back. Like I expect her to come in to my room at night, tuck me in and give me a goodnights kiss. Or surprise me when I get home from school when she would scrape up enough money to buy my favourite cereal." Robin put his hand on mine and intertwined our fingers.
"I'm still waiting for my dad to come home and show off some toy he bought me or ruffle my hair when I walk by him. I think denying that they're gone is a part of grief." Robin said and I nodded,
"I guess I'm in grief forever." Robin chuckled in a non-mean way and nodded.
After a minute, he looked over at his vinyl player,
"My dad loved Elton John dude" he said,
"Oh yeah? What was his favourite song?"