This is Me Trying ⭑ Rafe Cameron

one

CHAPTER ONE
[1]
song: crystalised by the xx

It was hard for JJ Maybank to be happy that his sister was back home. It was hard for everyone. Putting on smiles and acting like everything was as it used to be, painting 'welcome home!' on an old white sheet, hanging it up on the front porch of John B's home. 

John B was dead. Sarah Cameron too.

There was a reluctance to celebrate, a stillness in the air that lingered as no one was quite sure enough as to whether or not it was an appropriate time to or not. On one hand, their friend was home, back to the OBX after spending an entire year doing wilderness therapy, recovering, getting healthy again. On the other hand, their other friends were presumed dead only a week ago, a fatal drowning as the two were caught at sea during a storm.

Cassie knew things were off as soon as her brother picked her up on her final day at Kitty Hawk. He hadn't greeted her with a big smile, or a hug, or any sort of expression that she usually expected from him. Instead, he frowned, told her that he missed her, and that everything was gonna be okay.

She wasn't quite sure what JJ was referring to. The fact that their father was back in jail. The fact that their friends were killed, or the fact that those friends were also accused of a murder they never committed.

JJ had tried his best to write to Cassie every week. There were no phone calls allowed at Kitty Hawk, unless for emergencies. He kept her up to date on all of his adventures with the rest of the crew, which is promptly what he described them as. Adventures. JJ's way of saying: breaking and entering, theft, gunfights, scaling a well, finding four hundred million dollars worth of gold, losing four hundred million dollars worth of gold, stalling a plane from taking off with said gold, getting accused of killing a Sheriff.

It was hard for Cassie to keep up. JJ's handwriting was questionable, his vocabulary even more so. And there were bits and pieces he was leaving out, unintentional, but he forgot how out of the loop she really was at Kitty Hawk. He forgot how long she'd been gone.

She wrote him back every time, asking questions to try and understand, to try and feel the same adrenaline he was feeling when he was experiencing it all first hand. But every time he responded, there was a new adventure that he had to tell her about, leaving all of her previous questions unanswered, and only prompting new ones.

The only time JJ had called, was to tell her John B was dead.

Was it perfect, or horrible timing? No one really knew. She had five days left at Kitty Hawk after she got the call. She needed to be there for her brother, he had lost his best friend and she knew his ways of dealing with these sorts of things weren't very remarkable. Not that she had many better options, her own ways of dealing got her wound up at Kitty Hawk in the first place. So maybe her advice wasn't needed.

JJ pulled the car to a stop, it's breaks squeaking with a high pitched screech. Cassie peered through the front window of the car, waving to Kiara Carerra, and Pope Heyward, who were making their way over to the car, waving back.

The crew looked sad without John B standing there. She hadn't even said a word to them, and already she could feel his absence.

"Kie, Kie—" Pope puts his hand out, stopping the brunette from walking any further. He squints forward, gesturing to Cassie as she gets out of the van. "Is that? Is that Cassie Maybank?" He smiles.