The Human Addiction | Eminem

Touch Yourself

A.N. I MADE UP THE PHONE NUMBER, PLEASE DONT TRY CALLING IT LOL

The woman on the plane was a real reiki enthusiast.
She wore a leopard print dress with no form to it.
I hate leopard print but she was a nice person so I didn't feel the need to judge.
Every time the stewardess came by to offer her a drink or her meals, she'd place them on the tray table in front of her and perform calculated hand gestures over them.
Keep in mind this was a twenty hour flight.
I got real accustomed to this women.
Yes first class, so the experience wasn't so suffocating, but I still had a field day.

She'd ask me if she could perform reiki on me.
But no pressure.
I just looked uptight.

The great thing about being encased in a large metal vehicle 42,000 feet in the air is that you can be whoever you want to be.
You'll never see these people again- if you don't want to.

I had told her, "I've got this guy stuck to me like glue"
Then I took out the magazine and pointed to Marshall on the cover.
I said, "this is why I'm uptight."

"Wait, Eminem?" She had asked, eyes narrowing at the title.

"Yes, I'm friends with his friend and we met at a party literally only two nights ago"
I open up to the first page and show her the message he wrote for me.
"And look- the whole sex thing is really not something I'm into- but holy shit does he love it"

"I sensed you were experiencing something conflicting" she tells me, not seeming to question the validity of what I'm going through.
Look it's not the celebrity thing that makes me feel so perplexed about this whole thing.
It's how I managed to find myself in a situation with a dude who's hellbent on fucking me constantly.
Seriously I have real shitty luck.

I don't bother thinking by about how her 'sense' are probably bullshit.
I just kinda pretend I'm invested.

"Do you want advice? I can just perform some reiki on your heart"
This got real carried away really quick.
When she finished her session on me, she had swept her hands all the way down from my collarbone to my torso.
She said, "begone bullshit, fuck this- we don't need it"
Ok I thought that was pretty funny.

About a good few hours of the flight went to me telling her about how the reason why people are having a crisis for meaning and purpose is because we've been living off of old concepts from past generations.
We haven't created concepts for our current situation.
The economic systems have changed drastically, the state of the world has changed drastically.
There needs to be a philosophy for a new age.

Whatever.
Nothing special.
I spend the rest of the flight reading.

When I got out of the air port and into the hotel, I'd been awake for over twenty hours straight.
I can never sleep on a flight.
This is really perplexing and definitely not great for my mental health.
Once my trip to Italy took off at 5 pm so I had been awake all day, had the flight and had to adjust to the time zone, staying up for another whole day...
I was awake for 36 hours straight.
The hallucinations were insane.

So yeah, point being- I'm ready to go to fucking sleep.
But I'm sure I should probably call this psycho first.
Ok- lemme do the math here- Hong Kong is 12 hours ahead.
I got on the plane at 8 am...
It's about three thirty in the morning his time.
Fuck.
I don't even see the point in calling him, he'll be asleep.
But it's whatever.
I'll call and at least I can say that I did.
Then he can call me back at his own leisure.

It's the middle of the day here, but I don't give a shit.
I'll be cranking out after this.
I punch in his number and I'm heading over to the blinds in the hotel room.
I'm slamming them shut and heading back over to the stupid neat bed.
I don't feel guilty ruining it.